Monday, January 12, 2015

Learning Annex Detective

Veda,my wife hates that I keep swinging the story back to Dumbo.
 Veda thinks Dumbo is "weak lead"
I explain to her,once again -'He's led don't you see That's why he' s   weak....He's led on a a dog..

Veda has a real job,she's a lawyer.I,her husband, according to her friends have a "pseudo job"
I according to Veda's friends cannot even properly be called a "house husband"  because we do not have kids

I got my detective license  I over  heard a  friend joke at one of those Learning Annex classes, where housewives learn how to make quilts out of hemp or something.
I heard Veda laugh than say  "No. Fynn went to a genuine school...studied criminology and everything .First"

There was a strange pause before she said the word-FIRST.
the way she said FIRST as an after thought.or UNDERTHOUGHT of some kind...or with some "hidden meaning" and that "laugh"
made me listen  to the tape of her  laughing in a loop
to see if it was really just "cuz' everyone else was laughing ,,and it actually sounded kinda' funny"according to Veda ...
when I questioned her
I had bugged the room ...the entire house you see..with Veda's permission
I played her the tape and made her also view her "performance"  caught on one of the  hidden cams   I had placed around the house
 I had recently tried to soup up my "pseudo job" as detective by teaching myself first hand knowledge of electronic surveillance.
I asked Veda to not simply consider her gasp of laughter. When her friend said "Fynn got his detective
license at one of those Learning Annexes ,you know where they teach housewives how to make quilts out of hemp"
But see the entire display of disloyalty
from a different angle
The angle now a  still,on my computer screen that I had  cut and pasted into my facial recognizance program
which indicated by mathematical analysis of her 30 point Cadence Correlations
        the smile indicated
               malice and CONTEMPT
and not the "oh it was just funny" she said...

"if you have something to say to me Veda," please say it to my face,I said..I don't want to have to use facial recognition patterning algorithms to really know what's on your mind."

"oh Fynn ," she said....holding my head close to hers..."I love you and I love that you love  what you do.... "than she  said,"how many wives would allow their husband to wire their house for sound and vision?"
The word allow sticks in my head,,oh...she's "allowing me"
"I know what your thinking ,"Veda says fixing her blazer (her REAL person work clothes for her REAL job),,"I didn't mean I allow in..
:"I wasn't thinking of that...don't presume you know me so well"I say,although I was
"International man of Mystery....and all that..."she says,"Now THAT Fynn was sarcastic.."
She kisses me and she's back upstairs according to one of my cameras changing blazers

between detecting  jobs I had taken up writing...because aside from Veda's put job really is mysterious and fascinating..
because a detective not only collects evidence but also has to piece together evidence
One of the reasons I bought all of this facial and vocal recognizance equipment was to help me scientifically analyze not just data concerning phone records, paystubs to help withskip tracing..but also to help me not just listen to whatever tapes or visual recorded I have made concerning "a case"
but to "get behind" the words we make and
the faces we display to ourselves and others
that hide our true intent

Veda at first was happy that I had taken up writing between work
between jobs
Telling me that her niece and nephew love my stories I tell them about "my casework"
and that the young adult  market is wide open..
Young adult market ."I said" mean you see me writing for 12 year olds..?"
"That's not exactly what I meant"
I had recently gone to a conference that introduced those in the field of criminal investigation
that there were not headsets that could literally read than translate a person's brain waves into language.
Very expensive. But something I had my eye on...if only to find out what my wife really thought about me....I can only assume she might think I can write young adult books because I have not the mind of an adult
The only time she was completely upfront was when she was critiquing  my "stories"
 First-She refused to call "it" a novel
when I asked why ....she said "cause baby, novels aren't all over the place like this"

Veda had a problem with everything I did. Regarding my writing
"for instance this main character Dumbo...he's the hero right?but he doesn't do anything heroic does he..
He just sorta sits there like some lab monkey
being shown things and said things by this Brain Computer Interface
"A,I, I say"It;s called Artificial intelligence
and than I say" the reason he mainly just sits there is because
he IS a HUMAN MONKEY...a human Test"

Veda says that making Dumbo gay is also it will limit readership
even amongst the YA crowd.
"This is NOT a Young Adult book Veda.!."
" certainly not with all that filth it..... If Dumbo is autistic ...and you say he was actually raised to be autistic ."Veda says,"well autisitcs don't really have sex.or at least not very good sex," Veda says tapping me on the shoulder.
Did that tap mean something?
Will I have to go over the tapes when she leaves?To really see what that tap meant?
"Dumbo doesn't just sit there by the way
he is entrained by A.I. by visions and sounds and thoughts placed into his mind...'I say

"into the computer chips someone stuck in his head,"Veda says,"Fynn...I hate to explain that most people who write about people who have computer chips in their head either think THEY have computer chips in their head...or are writing for Young Adults...not adult adults.,
Maybe it can be a Graphic Novel...and Dumbo gets magical powers..."

Does Veda do this on purpose?I am thinking.Does she deliberately attempts to cheapen me
I see her apply a little more the mirror across the hall and she asks if I am out of Strawberry Quik,that she'll get me more on her way home..than I hear her singing

                              Have you heard that Mimsie Starr
                              She got "app-ed" in the Astor bar
                                      Well, did you evah?
                                             What a swell party this is!

.. Veda is singing directly into one of the hidden microphones,mocking the mic

She comes BACK  into  the kitchen ,which is my writing room. ..from 8:45am to 5:45 pm looking at how much Strawberry  Quik.. is in "the can" and next asks if I need more Count Chocula..
"it is 8 :52 a.m I say...folding my arms behind my head.
and she makes a big scene of stepping out of the kitchen to the dining room
"is Frankenberry alright Sir. If they are out of Boo Berry?

"Yes but no count Chocula..."

I want her out ...out at her" real job " I can feel REAL in mine

 .I had explained to Veda before if I described the  Dumbo's predicament   with a woman as the victim who had been "app-ed".. taken...held captive forced have sex....being essentially a white slave....someone's would be sickening  and indicative of maybe something the writer might want.."I say
"might be better ..if a reader thinks that! Fynn,,,,,than people thinking my husband's a frui,.not that there's anything wrong with it..people talk you know.."

 Being a fruit huh? ,,,"another THING I picked up at the Learner's Annex ?"I say

"see,now that's funny Fynn...and not even in a young audience way...ill see if they have Boo home at 6 .6-ish

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