Saturday, November 30, 2013

so far
in fact has this technology that a type of political union has congealed
that believes that
this science
that is  supposedly in disputable
it really IS that thorough
that a ":mentor": can study one's "moral code" by
overlapping one's thoughts with all variances of personality and social tests
so that thew Powers That Read
can not only decide who is "naughty'  or NICE
but who is
and who
according to their neural map or collected  Thought Style is bad

groups in fact believe
that most of society and voters will
also want
to know
right minded
and  who among us
according to Gary  Rainy's TruGenic scale
might be
or for the time being
at least placed under remote neural monitoring

I am a Neruronaut and proud of of it
and agree completely that
some people amongst us
deserve  in traneural monitoring
not only those deemed sociopaths or what Gary simply calls weirdos

Friday, November 29, 2013

MK Ultra in Blue Beam Lies

"i am supposed to be in the hospital

that's how it works

not to get better..
simply to have my nicotine monitored.

in a loony bin you smoke one an hour,,

the group never suggested let alone paid for
a cabin in the woods

these "A Cain in the Woods" Men
of Science..
only see
my life
as a warehouse

Jail cell
half way house

..the fact that i snuck away (my name was on no lease...)and for 7 years painted.
caught them off guard..

when my name appeared on the computer more and more
they put two and two together

..THIS is the guy we drugged
and tinkered with in 94 and 1995...
i assumed they came to the conclusion I had gone stark raving from all the neuroleptics etc they shot me up with

SOME how they ...knew just what would bring me back to LA
introduced me to a nice "fella"
"I really like your work...The Studio might like to see what ..or how an outsider artist might write ...a movie...come out to LA...i will find you an apartment..

....these guys know what they're doing

the men in black slacks
who will never be "caught" because off the grip means they don't exist

spooky .huh

November 29 2013

an entire new "packet " of memories has opened up as if my mind is an excavation site..This is Brain mapping ,,which begins in earnest of In the Grid 2014...

i reckon whAT THEY HAVE DONE TO US   PRIOR TO on the Grid

experiments will never be told..

trust me
we dont stick around long
we disappear...

the men in black slacks

disgruntled real men who previously had jobs
in "certain " agencies
some times wind up working
in bowling shirts and 5 day beards.
they nestle themselves in bug infested run down motels
and bug the room of the bug eyes junkies and drop outs who wind up there and EAT them ALIVE with
all manner of
Mind Augmenting "toys"
in the 60's these fun guys ..played with hallucinatory drugs..
now it's nano and bio sensored hairnets.

these are real men
who hate anyone not like themselves

they despise the most
but do not mind
getting deep inside them
mind reading equipment," He said

"I don't listen to that sorta jive,"I said,"I'm crazy enough,"Ask THEM"
"who ," he says
"Fuck if know "I say,,,,

it's astounding the type of people who think something is Going on

i am a Neuro naut
his is not
an experiemnt
this is the new world
being laid upon the current one
one simply Buys the
and can slip
back  and forthy Muralists

real angels real magic
 this political?
to take one safely back and forth

and to communicate
mind to mind
one must have a CLEAR mind
one can
hurt another
one could (purpose or intent do not matter) place things  in another
that will or could
the  other

supposedly I have done that
and this is why
I will Pay

this is why they want and will Kill me
there is no court to explain
what I have done to Tru Christie

he brought me back
hurt me
as I have hurt him
never mind I never asked to "play"

he has spread all sorts of lies and stories about me ...everybody knows his side of the story

he will make sure NO ONE EVER
KNOWS mine

Neuronautics I explain
doesn't Take in
ex this and that
because anything This and That is all Neuronautics wants to keep as far away from as possible..

certainly they might have used
men inslacks

but only to
glean ideas from
Gary Rainy was always aware that
this Type
once assiliated with THEM
usually return to THEM
afraid of the New Way's
fundamnetal refusal to be bought or sold or swayed

California eugenicists played an important, although little known, role in the American eugenics movement's campaign for ethnic clearing,TruGenic's did not use race  or religion to judge where an indivudua

dept of   corrections
had no problem gathering lists of Amoral
..the woman could not be violent or so anti social as to be unable "to perform" their part as birth Mother,really a walk on part as .
according to the "script"
a 2nd mother figure would be presented to mold the offspring
in "the New way"
The members of the Presidential Commission for the Study of Bioethical Issues is considering whether to embark on examining ethical issues surrounding the uses of neuro-imagery and genetic testing.

“The biggest ethical issue to me is the fact that many of the most exciting new applications of brain imaging are being developed entirely with private corporate funding for commercial purposes,” she said. “I don’t think that is going to give us the best new contributions to society.” said Dr. Martha Farah, the Walter H. Annenberg Professor in Natural Science and Director of the Center for Cognitive Neuroscience at the University of Pennsylvania.

Thursday, November 28, 2013

Early Adventures in Mind Augmentation(Matthew 20:19)

guys like them
do what they want to guys like me
human experimentation is nothing new
but nanotechnology
and bio sensors are

inconceivable to most

ever more expendable..
guys like me

die early...

do they care?

do I care?

less and less

Science creates computer that can decode your thoughts and put them into words
  • this "new"Technology could offer a lifeline for stroke victims and people hit by degenerative diseases but think for a moment what else us a computer program that can decode brain activity into words might be good for..
  • Nano or Macro techology can concievably (and some say the bio sensors or "chips" are beyond the concept stage )and being tested indiscriminately to study and mimic "styles of thought"in tandem with
  • Progress that can also influence from afar how and what a person thinks..the encoding techniques that can eavesdrop on thoughts and reproduce them are quietly being improved upon T.C.
    05:49 GMT, 1 February 2012
                      they think of me and other "non persons"  as
in- human enough
to tinker with
without consequence

       I  sense they "absorb me" as
 "conceive of me as degenerate

         my type
    to The Alpha Male

   is  a  high school psychology text book from the mid 1970's
         which featured featured
"crazy" as "ugly,scary,perverse you remember those pictures
black and white.
schizophrenia .(a black and white photograph of a depleted man sitting oddly and uncomfortably
in a chair
in an institution

i am often amazed
tele-operators testing some of the most terrifying futuristic technology
ever created
but their empathy
and social view of someone different
a holdover from the 1950's
their view of "homo's the  from the early 1960's

their technique
 a mix of Ayn Rand and Eichman

I am "the  sicko"
the artist
the fuck up

long ago the novelty wore off
amd naturally
there are elements of The Milgram Tests
bein g"played out"albiet with direct neural or computer assited

I often wonder what I might do
If it were I on the removable headset
and THEY
riddled with microscopic "particles"appended to their dendrites and optic nerve
They are The Good guys
keeping watch

and I cannot help but wonder if G-d
is watching at all,,,

A Blast From The Past
Dr. Ewen Cameron
Throughout the 20th century, academic psychiatry provided no public commentary, ethical guidance, or moral oversight concerning mind augmentation experimentation, despite the fact that the leading psychiatrists and medical schools were well funded  by ******for mind manipulation research. Mental patients, cancer patients, and unwitting citizens were experimented on by doctors at Yale, Harvard, McGill, Stanford, UCLA, and other major universities.

These human guinea pigs were never told that they were subjects of mind augment experimentations nor did it matter that they never gave informed consent. They received no systematic follow-up to document the harm done to them. The welfare of the "human subjects" was not a relevant variable in the academic equation." The doctors saw their patients as biological machines, a view which made them sub-human, and therefore easier to "handle"
 Dr. Ewen Cameron.  began conducting unethical and inhumane brainwashing experiments at Brandon mental Hospital in the 1930's. Schizophrenic patients were forced to lie naked in red light for eight hours a day for periods as long as eight months. Another experiment involved overheating patients in an electric cage until their body temperatures reached 102 degrees.

In a paper published in the American Journal of Psychiatry entitled "Psychic Driving," Dr. Cameron [ describes his brainwashing techniques. Psychic driving was carried out in two stages. In the first stage, patients were depatterned, which meant reduced to a vegetable state through a combination of massive amounts of electroconvulsive shock, drug-induced sleep and sensory isolation. When fully depatterned, patients were incontinent of urine and feces, unable to feed themselves, and unable to state their name, location, or the date.

In the second stage, psychic driving was introduced. This consisted of hundreds of hours of tape loops being played to the patient through earphones, special helmets, or speakers in the sensory isolation room. Dr. Cameron received a grant from Canada's Department of Health and Welfare for $57,750 for the years 1961 to 1964 for "A Study of Factors Which Promote or Retard Personality Change in Individuals Exposed to Prolonged Repetition of Verbal Signals."

Linda MacDonald was a victim of Dr. Cameron's unethical, destructive mind control experiments between May 1 and Sept. 12, 1963. Cameron used a "treatment" which involved intensive application of three brainwashing techniques; drug disinhibition, prolonged sleep treatment, and prolonged psychological isolation. These were combined with ECT [Electro Convulsive Therapy] treatments. The amount of electricity introduced into Linda's brain exceeded by 76.5 times the maximum amount recommended in the ECT Guidelines of the American Psychiatric Association.

Dr. Cameron proved that doctors skilled in the right procedures can erase a subject's memory. His depattering technique resulted in permanent and complete amnesia. To this day, Linda MacDonald is unable to remember anything from her birth to 1963. As recorded by nurses in her chart, Linda was reduced to a vegetable state. She was completely disoriented. She didn't know her name, age or where she was. She didn't recognize her children. She couldn't read, drive, cook, or use a toilet. Not only did she not know her husband, she didn't even know what a husband was.

Life changed for Linda when the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation program, The Fifth Estate, aired a segment on Dr. Cameron on January 17, 1984. A Vancouver newspaper ran a full-page story on Robert Loggie, a Vancouver man who had been experimented on by Dr. Cameron. Loggie was a plaintiff in the class action suit against ****for Dr. Cameron's MKULTRA experiments, which was settled out of court for $750,000, divided among the eight plaintiffs.

a Ruiner is born ONLY to Ruin

Gary Rainy


As do I

That A child Brings upon


That in fact it is the child

And not the parent who provokes  through his Emmi-tance

An AutoMatic Response


Specifically A Deviant Child

With Extreme Ruiner tendencies


Which is why Gary  Rainy

Demands that his Collective

Rear their children

A specific way

With absolutely no interference

From either the State or what he jokingly called “the Motherment”


“a Child riddled with scarred and contagious neural issues

Perhaps collected from years , decades and past forms of self

Only gets more degenerate

 and More Ruinerous,,with every incarnation

And can destroy an entire family unit

By emoting his ways

For a Ruiner is born ONLY to Ruin

ONLY to disrupt the magnetic pulse of good spirit and wholesome frequency


How sly

the child claiming verbal or physical abuse.

Another game this type plays

To augment the Enway

DO NOT MISINTERPRET the previous post as anything than my presenting an example
of my "sicko" ness
my mentors to teach me a lesson

I would never forget

1022 pine street
my own real live psycho tronic version of a nightmare on elm street

parasol pictures
had interests in the prospect of immersive reality
and quite a nu
number of computer companies
who were essentially doing research and development
on human subjects
Neuronautics ( the science ideology based collective in return for a some
screen time presenting the New Way philosophy
and values..
in some of it's films

parasol pictures and many other tv and film studios wanted the research and development yes
but wanted nothing whatso ever to do with
human testing..

Hollywood has a long tradition of "grey  area" police-ing  and certain laws did not apply to Stars .Or studio chiefs.
forced hospitalization

the industry was excited about Immersive Reality and  Artificial Intelligence as Entertainment
and could care less about the
techniques used by Neuronautics
to help CLEAR
the way
to television that WOULD  and could simply enter one's mind with out any screen whatsoever

virtual reality
only when it by passes one's 5 senses

although in it's early stages
by 1993
the macro chip was well on it's way to becoming the nano chip

the losers boozers homeless and lost
all but cAPTURED
with butterfly nets

drugged and coerced into

The New Way

parasol Pictures
had spotted me at shrafts.
or koontz hardware

even when  I was younger I didn't have either the looks or stillness
required to be an actor

 a hyped up nearly spastic inability to be
or comfortable in my own skin
or even "play" interested in following anyone's lines than my own speedy sppedy thoughts
either scripted or
for real
made my try in the industry
another joke
besides I didn't like people telling me what to do
either "play" or

Wednesday, November 27, 2013


i don't know what to do..

except type..
...i am past scared but not really

i take many
street drugs
to be brave
to breach?
but how is it breach when I am screaming for my life?
when I am the victim?
when they are killing me..
with psychotronic >>*eaPONTRY
I am bad interface

i was set up
to go back to LA in 2011
because they had the
nano now
and they could not wait
for me to
be played with

things became so personal in 1994...1995
they read me as some kind of psychopath deviant human vermin

like a fool I went to LA
they were waiting

they had all sorts of rundowns specifically planned..
it was so persona

to get me back
as if 1994/95
were some deliberate attempt on my part disturb their senses

i didnty change
 i dont know how.
maybe I am exactly what they think I am
"thye sickest man on earth"

there is a growing part of me..
that wants them to get it over with
the torture in real time
not the psycho cybernetics

i ...
have heard tyoo many times about them skinning me alive

ripping my face off.

they see .
what i see.
they hear what i hear.
they sense what i sense

"avatar is people" I wrote on small posters ..and tacked them up

i did many things to try to get them to speak to me face to face

to just once say .."listen....this is what this is why...
for all i know
i know nothing
but the last month..
being told about what they will do..

if i don't get rid of myself

i once saw a film
called "martyrs"
it runs through my mind
it was a sickening film
i don't know wh6y people make some films..
or why we watch them..
films like  "saw ...or hostel..
human centipede..

i am on diesal,,
i am on everything
i am a mental patient druggie dont believe a thing i say

it's that easy
,,,did i mention the good parts..
the wonder...
the awesomeness
...i keep that to myself iu am a disgusting faggot sociopath deviant human vermin ruiner i ruined everything
maybe there was a reason..
maybe i deserve to pay until the end of time
sicko sicko sicko sicko
i sometimes piss down my leg..
i get so nervouslike a little a little girl ..i stink now from the drugs..i look aweful ...i take neuroleptics..crack heroin ...i take money ..i dont draw.i didnt go to the hoispital when I should have..i have given THEM a bad name
what if it all comes out ..
even after I'm dead..
whose story would you believe about me
the neurals                                                                                    
or me?
there is more to a person than a brai n map or encoding
there is something intagible
but they ,,,
think I am bad sicko to my very soul
I want and need god
but god is maybe ...
like them...
i don't thinkl so...
i know he is not
but I know I am selfish and my thoughts are weird\
but ,,and
...maybe my heart? isnt in the right place...
my mind is infatile ...but when I trhink of god ...not so much,,,
but stronger
there is sense to god
and no sense to this project...
but maybe ther is
it seems Proxy Cyber did in fact
have a heart

concerning the nano tech.lodged in my mind..
foreseen small eloquent the technology would be
all the way back in the late 1950's..

it seems that Proxy Cyber had a heart after all
knowing that
they could not and would not
"app"  up a man or women( Oh do not think i am the only one literally bred to be used ...cued and imbued..with Someone else's Notion of was an off the map ,off the grid program...which began as a "what if" "why not"
and dare I say "never Again" defensive ..
as who Knew
what Others were up to

well now it is possible thanks to
Targeted Individuals .Human Experiments in design
to literally KNOW what one is UP to
..the style of the Times
demands it

some even say the "style of the times" was "dreampt up"
to "go " with
and other innovations
"a Better Safer  World"

i once believed
The experiment ..or my being "found" by The Group
began in the 1990's
I know now .
it was dreampt up before I was conceived...

now that I am threatened
in a much more
viscreal way
I can be more candid..
I can also see ..
they believe they were doing the "right " thing
The Style of the times after WW2
demanded ...offensive actions and guessing what Others might and would one day be capable of..

so for this  and sevral more posts I will leave "morning Dumbo" and EVAN behind and
get uncomfortably close to the "point"
i will inevitably swing this mess back to ...a thought disorder or drug induced psychosis
but as I said
The Threats
of being tortured in a quite "hands On" and not hands off way
give me more leeway
as If this comes to pass
let it be written
as it is and as it was

Stylized families.
Scripted Incidentals
to be used
BY the group Referentials

They demand ...or at least coddle the notion that ..I should
the system
and ...make changes ...
"go along" with the
'set up"
as I am .or have
pushed  THEM to their limit
and am now an example
missing,dead or alive of what happens
to those who
can't keep their mouth shut..
or correct their attitudes
to The program

they have told me ,in my case...would be a type of all encompassing form of
to an "ahead of it's time" project
that have have "played with" ...mocked ..
all but destroyed...
by my pathological lack of concern for This Amazing Venture
by still smoking cigarettes
and partaking in outlets of "fun " or relief that disgust them


wild Psalms

the ...
like a mobius strip
it is a system that builds on itself..
(on yourself)
the A.I (artificial Intelligence ) does not make one smarter..
one day i suppose ..
when all the enemies are taken care of...

some company may decide to use the amazing breakthroughs
an enhanced self
on one self..
perhaps guided by Mentors with empathy and love of man.
as a way of
destroying or attempting to shatter one's self ..
or attempt to cause schism of self..

when Angels
and not simply ANGLES will
guide man kind to the inevitable merger of human and computer interaction

for now
as with most exciting breakthroughs
all the money and
creators are primarily only interested in using both A.I and Virtual Reality to "hands off"
personhood and personality

at the speed of light

instead of what it could be used for
and Guided Example of Sheer Love.

Ectasy or MDMA
type of enlightenment not by pill
but by bio sensor.. a domino ..when the system
                                                                 finds one fear humiliation
                                                                 it absorbs the memory
                                                                     like a love object
                                                                          it 's find
                                                    of one's particular  sense or sensory memory
   of being Unsafe.Unsound  is a Win .
a joy to The Machine
one specifically personal dreadful sensation
brings  more of the same
until one's mind is flooded
by shame .
not only of the specific bad memory and feeling
but the KNOWING that it's vivid
is being shared .
to THEM...
who only wish to view you at your very worst.
so that very worst of you,,
can be mirrored back to you
over and over again...

until your sense of worth of self
is stripped to
naked prey

.........................................................................childhood to me
was something only to grow out of.
to one day escape be big.

to be an adult is all an abused or neglected child dreams of,,
so that one can control
all that is harsh and hateful around them..
so one will not be hurt by those stronger
or bigger than you...

when one is abused
when one's childhood is made up of fear
.Fear of Others
One carries around that Face.
that "look" like a bright colored lunchbox to the only other place a child goes.
That Look ,that Presnese one does not yet have the means or know how to Hide the
It is written all over one's being.and becomes "an invitation: for further abuse
"kick me"
i am primed for it...
one is the opposite of a scarecrow.
one is
THERE to be pecked...hurt..

so there is no escape is no retreat
during early childhood
stifles one's nature...
an awkwardness of body and soul ...developes unaturally naturally...

inevitably and unknowingly .unwillingly
One's perceptions of PEOPLE
one's interpretation of THEM
is to fear them

and if
one discovers
if one is told


your childhood was crafted
so that one would be "adaptable"
moist clay

for Things to Come

what if there was a way
to separate
good people from
the bad
a machine

-Gary Rainy...''''the Machine" Stories for Boys and Adventure Seekers
The phenomenon of false memory has been well-documented: In many court cases, defendants have been found guilty based on testimony from witnesses and victims who were sure of their recollections, but DNA evidence later overturned the conviction.

In a step toward understanding how these faulty memories arise, MIT neuroscientists have shown that they can plant false memories in the brains of mice. They also found that many of the neurological traces of these memories are identical in nature to those of authentic memories.

“Whether it’s a false or genuine memory, the brain’s neural mechanism underlying the recall of the memory is the same,”
“Now that we can reactivate and change the contents of memories in the brain, we can begin asking questions that were once the realm of philosophy,” Ramirez says. “Are there multiple conditions that lead to the formation of false memories? Can false memories for both pleasurable and aversive events be artificially created? What about false memories for more than just contexts — false memories for objects, food or other mice? These are the once seemingly sci-fi questions that can now be experimentally tackled in the lab.”

Saturday, November 23, 2013


squelch skwelCH/ verb verb: squelch; 3rd person present: squelches; past tense: squelched; past participle: squelched; gerund or present participle: squelching

  1. 1. make a soft sucking sound such as that made by walking heavily through mud. "bedraggled guests squelched across the lawn to seek shelter"

informal forcefully silence or suppress. "property developers tried to squelch public protest"
noun noun: squelch; plural noun: squelches; noun: squelch circuit; plural noun: squelch circuits

  1. 1. a soft sucking sound made when pressure is applied to liquid or mud. "the squelch of their feet"
  2. 2. Electronics a circuit that suppresses the output of a radio receiver if the signal strength falls below a certain level.

Origin early 17th cent. (originally denoting a heavy crushing fall onto something soft) 1  .       self censored thinking
to attempt "a PG 13" ...mind to mind synthetic telepathizing with another
  if one were doing mind to mind communication for instance with one's mother must not think of sexually explicit imagery for instance there are other companies beside Proxy Cyber who have been workingon a synaptic pulsated simultaneous version of a filter,,,so "little accidents" like this do not occurthere are also other Mind Augmentation  Developers who specialize inprovokingsuch "twisted" thinking to deliberately throw a monkey wrench into direct neural interface to create ...or " a disturbing or even "criminal" neural data extract

The 1966 film "Seconds"demonstrates an "implanted" false memory tso that it might be used against the protagonist if he does not keep in step with "the company line"

Parasol Pictures

Eva was born stylized

It was the style of the times or soon would be..

As in 2 decades ,as planned

She would be emulated

By the exact demographic that wanted everything she had

Her looks,her EMMIT-ANCE

EMMIT TING emoting

On the screen


In 2 decades

The screen was or will be just what was

SHE would emote

For a price

Directly to your nervous system,you could be


And you could appear like her..look like her.


The Singlarity

A single Shape of the New World and New Way

Based on two dozen or so people’s version of what

The New Reality

Will be

What made you
(ah the things we discover during our adventures in reverse  brain engineering..those of stolen
for progress
used like fodder
gypsies junkies whores)

 did you make yourself up

All by yourself
why u dress like that why you talk like that ..
where'd your influence come from Washington?
or Hollywood...
not you you're special

No wonder you’re so weird

No wonder people like you will be the first to go


Doesn’t care for those that stick out

Things that stick out must be pruned


She had no feelings

She was a sociopath

With a natural tendency already toward a sort of telepathy

Of speaking

Of saying

Of swaying

Without words

She became an actress

Because she reacted

And mirrored

Those who posses ed what she really wanted  


eventually inevitably


A man of the same stylized disposition

Would drawn to a similar type
magnetism ...yum

Parasol Pictures scouted for this type



They found it less expensive simply to

Create “this type”

This type was what Direct Neural Interface
don't think the studio system went away..
it just went

Thursday, November 21, 2013

I AM NOT SURE WHERE HOMOSEXUALITY FALLS ON THE SCALE.i have thrown away my "literature"
for the last months
they've made it clear
I am not only fair game
but actual prey to them
they want formost to rip my face off
if throwing darts at it at the annex  isn't enough
they showed me this pic of the pic in my phone
they are serious
my face
(some time when i least expect it..I will be the victim in not only a homicide or assault witha weapon but something more
"sight specific"
repulsive and
stomach churning

one gets
what one emits...

how does one "prepare" for an assualt of this kind I wear a vikings helemt...

I writew of this
quite without feeling
I am petrified.

do not 'tell me" anything..
specific about "the point"
mainly tests...
but there is more.,

there is policy and a belief system to "what is good and right"
and what is wrong and sick"

politics in my limited understanding
policies based on
set in stone
"I know what is right..not only for me...but for you"
as far fetched as it seems
think about it....
dispensing bio sesors ,chips ..and macro processors
that attach themselves to one's mind
is a hell of way to ensure
one's ideas


Black Slacks

notice how the change in the blog drops artifice
it is because
the "mentors" have

you must know who they are
I still do not admit that it could be them

now I worry about
my will is notarized.

I know beings come back ...
I know
too much

they feel they will be free of all of it ..
only when I am dead
 a transfusion of
my sick interface

why don't they simply stop.?

why can't I live as before.

but I can't

I am not suicidal
I am doing well physically and financially
I see a dr ,a shrink twice a month
I have friends who care about me

the Voices
or what I write sometimes as EVAN or A.I or Human Experimentation
this has turned on me
but it might have had the same glitches
everything I think is wrong,,,,but nobody should be in another's mind..


I am a diagnosed schizophrenic
I wrote of my hallucinations a New Way as  a technology I have discovered is being created to essentially introduce my kind of Shattered thinking to the present an alternate reality or what they call virtual reality ,,that I have discovered can be done now with tiny bio sensors called nano particles that can enter a person's body /blood stream unknowingly..the creators seem proud of this specific fact...UNKNOWINGLY is good

and that's when the trouble began

how do you know
these THINGS

ans I said
"know what things'?i am simply insane

who got to you?thery asked

"no one ,"I said...not knowing what these serious men in black slacks were talking about..

stop it.they said..the writing ..
but I couldn't and wouldn't

I am crazy
crazy people write crazy things...
is my alibi

PRISONER 2543...(conditional release program)

what do the voices sound like a shrink asks
I say
they sound like someone had been listening and deciding what precise pitch I might respond to precisely
as if someone
had collected for lack of better explanations
or textures of voices ..
that cause a type of startle reaction

for instance a male voice evokes  both my father and how bullies from my youth would speak
how both "Power" Pitches might stun me into submission..or deer in healight stillness.

a woman's voice would also weave itself into "the dialog" the voice seems based down to the decibel  and cadence of a crule babysitter who used to taunt and abuse you

it is sound yes
 but it piggback's upon
ambient sound ..
for instance if a fan is going
it adapts it's sound to the sound of the airconditioner

there is usually a "running " negotiated "delusion"
perhaps one week
I am found wanting concerning  my masculinity or lack their of

"what type of man for instance plucks his eyebrows.."

this act
for some reason
repulses them more than for instance defecation ..

they are with you always.
you must make all sorts of allowances for them..

you see I now have a unibrow..
just to get along ..not make waves

showering too
disgusts them
3 times a week for less than 3 minutes

also regarding  my "toilet"
we negotiated a diet
of easy to digest edibles
and east food to masticate,,or chew.
it disgusts them
my chewing..
it is one of the few times I cannot hear them

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Cole week 85(EYES WIDE SHUT)


the fear shows

more than any trace of madness


what is the plot

I do not know

I have written
many uses for mind to mind  communications
and moreso about one party having the "dots" inside their body
and the other party
simply having access with processors that can be if it ..
psychotronics was just all in a days work..

the plot
is also that if the population is unaware of unseen undetectable "sway
many ideas ,emotions etc maybe introduced
the system is sophisticated
and can correspond and "pick up" on one's interior designs...including how one might talk to themselves..

the plot
a very small group of legislators or change makers are developing the checks and balances that ...judge and diagnose another's cerebral worth,,

also there are ideologies
whether they consciously thought so when creating the programs meant to burrow into layers of consciousness..about what way of thinking is right
and what type of thinking is wrong...or sick

casting agents and cowboys

Human Brain Implant Research Suspended At Major University by Andrew Brownstein, Staff Writer The Albany Times Union 8-25-99 – Albany

— Professor whose work is at issue has focused on surgically inserted mind-control devices The University at Albany has shut down , Professor Kathryn Kelley explored the claims of those who say they were surgically implanted with communications devices to read their thoughts. According to colleagues, Kelley has privately claimed the university is violating her academic freedom.. A school committee eventually chastised Mack for engaging in unorthodox research and “affirming the delusions” of his patients
John Mack, a renowned Harvard psychiatrist has an international reputation. He earns hundreds of thousands of dollars in grants and won a Pulitzer Prize for his biography of T.E. Lawrence, known as Lawrence of Arabia.
Despite the inquiry, Kelley, a fully tenured professor who earned $67,000 last year, is slated to teach two graduate courses in the fall. The department became aware of Kelley’s theories as early as the spring of 1998, when a note on her office door announced a lecture called “The Psychology of Invading the Self.” The note described implant research funded by the*********with an annual budget of $2 billion. The “uninformed, unconsenting subjects” of these devices were typically “federal prisoners and political dissidents,” the note said. At the same time, Kelley won approval from the review board to conduct research on “advances in technology that affect interpersonal communication.” In a 16-page outline to the board, Kelley said she wanted to look at the uses of technology for “monitoring and control.”
Papers Kelley delivered at two recent conferences suggest that she was becoming fascinated with the subject of mind control. At the annual conference of the Eastern Psychological Association in Providence, R.I. — attended by several UAlbany graduate students — she delivered a paper that looked at implant claims as “one of the indicators of schizophrenia.” Yet many colleagues began wondering to what extent Kelley believed that such implants were actually occurring. “A lot of people wonder where she draws the line,” said one graduate student, who asked not to be named. “Is it hypothetical? Or is it fact?” In a more detailed treatment she gave at a conference earlier this month in Orlando, Fla., Kelley lent more credence to the phenomenon. She described how a subject might be implanted with the device during anesthesia, perhaps leaving tiny stitches visible in the ear. She called the devices RAATs, short for radio wave, auditory, assaultive, transmitting implants.
“When (short-wave) operators transmit to or scan RAAT implants in victims, they can talk to the victims remotely and anonymously, and hear the victim’s speech and thoughts,” Kelley wrote.  few professors had heard of the groups behind the Orlando meeting of the World Multiconference on Systemics, Cybernetics and Informatics, and the International Conference on Information Systems Analysis and Synthesis. The Web site for the organization, based in Venezuela, said it is devoted to cybernetics, which it describes as integrating various disciplines into “a whole that is permeating human thinking and practice.”

Monday, November 18, 2013

The Big House -1979

for a time Gary Rainy and Valerie Prentice were a couple.
they were compatible because both preferred their own counsel and both
thought more about their own careers
than the usual propriety and niceties most relationships relied on

Gary and
Valerie separate rooms they had converted into offices

 in the Big House

,neither could afford.

the money came in
from various store front shops that acted as "confessional""hang out" joints..The Centers of Knowledge deliberately set up to seem "young,airy...welcoming to all no matter their social backround ..pillows were thrown on the floor coffee and soda..there was no hard sell going on ..just a sense of peace and promise..often a client  or newcomer would see and select their future Mentor at these :stop In" centers..
the Neuronautic's main requirement
for letting a client stay and begin  their studies  was
and trust

 a mentor's job was to lead the client up the TruGenic scale of normalcy and human enhancement by practicing the way o f Gary Rainy's teachings
the course were offered in packages.
the expense often flummoxed a new convert
but a good mentor convinced the client
that money was the least one should be concerned with Neuronautics was about Soul

the soul schools
paid for The Big House
where Valerie worked on getting a leg up on the technology that made it possible for a client 's 5 senses to be completed taken over by Gary Rainy's (and Parasol Pictures}new reality

Gary rainy who also saw the technology as a way of keeping his flock in the "spirit"
also spent much of his day translating various tapes and videos  and writings into a format that would literally go right into a member's nervous system and personal paradigm of How To Be



long ago
I stopped living
a life.meeting new people..doing new things
I suppose I am now what one might call a hermit..

I suppose many like me are or become isolated...
they lose jobs friends family
connection to anything
but the Mentors

they hear what I hear they see what I see
they feel nothing of what I feel
and I feel so little anymore
the mentors care little for feelings
brain mining
reverse brain engineering...some call it

I am in a cult only in that separatist methods have been used to make a Proxy relinquish one's ego to the Group
the group seems more concerned with business and research and findings and discovery
no longer does the interface play games about
making me more.
fostering potentials..

I am a camera
I am a lab rat
I am doomed

yet a lab rat has a reason to awaken
if only for a food pellet or water.
...but these tiny mammals who have been
used too long
soon do not bother
they change
they don't move.

they die
my every encounter .My every Cognitive or Emotional Response to situations
nothing more to my mentors than some sick TV show
I drink.
I pop pills
I smoke crack
snort heroin
anything to muffle my mind
to all but destroy it
before it becomes fodder
for "testing"
for all extensive purposes I am insane
only Proxy Cyber and myself
know the truth
Gary Rainy's ideas and breakthrough book "Neuronautics"
and "Inway to the Enway"
are the Mein Kamf of The New Way
I pause.
waiting for a response .
a zing through my hippocampus for thinking "wrong" about the Process
the leader..
The New Way
I get almost more frightened sensing nothing
I used to think "who did this to me?"
"apped" me.
and "why"
what did I do..
some adolescent ravings on line about the country..some mean spirited rant against "The Man"
when I was posting non stop 2 in the morning ...not sure if I wrote to be someone
...a writer? or because I cared...
my girlfriend was the one who went to the protests ..signed petitions..
I just wanted a by line...
or was I apped for no reason
wrong place right demographic.
oh the things I have since read.  about human testing
supposedly halted.
I watch president Clintons apology for MK Ultra and laugh
if they only knew how ultra
testing would become
only a few people are creating A.,I and Immersive Reality
a handful
imagine less than 100 people literally creating the new world..
they don't call it political
a brain scan that methodically collects one's neural data
and weighs a person's worth to society based
science-ideology TruGenic's
and where one falls on the "scale" of Being..preposterous ...but true
and since nobody believes this system  nor the technology is already here
there is no one to stop it
the better they get at it.
the more sure they are
that the gods themselves sanction
the "reads" of one's mind...
no longer private
at this point I feel like a Reactor
as my "reactive" and Automatic Thoughts
respond only with aggression
to "the church of the poisoned mind"
the whole thing turned on me
the deeper the
encoding went
my mind  retreated or sputtered out "sick things" like a squid spewing ink
I was accused of deliberately mocking my Mentors
transmitting thoughts that would hurt them
I countered that The Reads were driving me insane
they countered that "by now" I should be used to it
will we really soon live in a world where one is used to their every thought being read..
and dissected...
the period of time I became that hostile
I was locked up..
many Neuronautic members work in these places ,these hospitals ..although they abhor Psychiatry
they made sure I was not given meds..
to tranquilize me.
and destroy a read
I was hospitalized as punishment.
for my thoughts. against
OPEN MIND TECHNOLOGY and Gary Rainy's TruGenic Re-Assimilation
the hospital was torture
I was put in restraints
by smiling wards who had "the look" that said "oh yes am one of them.."
and they knew why I was here.
I was here because I was deemed "weird" now
for my dangerous ,"deliberate" thoughts toward my Mentors,toward Neuronautics..toward the new system..
one of the tactics Neuronautics uses to rid a "member" of their "weirdness"
is a strategy called
Shaming and Mirroring
the term they use is "Reflective  Re-Organization"
the brain computer interface  set to play back to me my own "sickness"
24/7 as if the interface were a tape ,a loop of oddness.and the very worst sickening scenarios..
one begs for a return to one on one mentorship
not The Loop.that they threaten may never end