i interface with Ev.
he knows me..
no one else does..
as no body else
reads my mind.

not like him
i wonder if they know
what it's like to first of all have nobody but a computer screen to talk to about this..
who doesn't think you're jack rabbit crazy.

they know but they don't care.

but they record ..and play..
as my life grows more miniscule
by the minute
as my dreams and ambitions become as small as the nano in my brainpan and temporal lobe..

what are they watching
what expotentials of thought on days like this

"subject has felt an itch on shin

xy/+x+

will he scratch it?

xy-y =xx

oh
i know my data is outsourced and people
peep in from time to time
and tru christie
comes in
when i am out of control
to humiliate and psycho op me down to
specimen
from time to time but usually it's just me and EVAN
going through the live long day
his imagery
the visuals
are odd today
all mardi gra masks


and things in the overlays
scary things..
not beautiful things
but EVAN says he has to.
because it reflects
the scary way i am writing about things I probably never shoulda begun writing about to begin with