Clay

they are being nicer..not as much kill yourself as soon as possible. kill yourself as soon as possible kill yourself as soon as possible

 kill yourself as soon as possible

 kill yourself as soon as possible kill yourself as soon as possible

 

i am sober a month..they clain that they helped get me sober by scaring the hell out of me(they made me imagine what they could do with the sounds."we'll play the sound of a ping ball going back

and forth

back

and forth louder

than this for the rest of your life Dumbo!"

and those things that you see

will be bugs.

and up close

and personal;one day you might wake up and see ONLY what we want you to see

..want a demonstration

suck on that glass stem and have another hit .."

but the Psychotronia  is

calm today

I am suspicious

as  

I have been sucked into OPEN MINDED ness

before

 

only to find that a  little 'Let them In" I like it

 

 can lead to

one getting "sucked in" not only towards a state of welcomed Mandling

but the Delusions

 that Immersive Reality

( a 5 sense over ride )inevitably

create

even in a seasoned Proxy

like myself

who should no to keep one's guard up and their mind CLOSED

 

I fear the Winkies stuff

everyone they've done this to fears

The "Winkies " stuff

Winkies always leads to meeting a monster behind the

INT/EXT -DAY/NIGHT

 

 the Muralists who

shove over" 16 Reasons"

and" Every Little Star" up your visual and auditory cortex

 

once again down the "virtual" rabid hole (how virtual is something I ask that can cause a sheart attack or mini stroke caused by adrenal induced fear...)

 in spite of knowing  one usually goes

"for the ride" one has little choice

I HAVE NO HEADSET I CAN TAKE OFF

and  who doesn't want to follow the hot ass

of a movie star

 

in candy colored "pay" dreamz

all four burners on now

direct neural TV

plays without an off switch  

in "your" commandeered

-deer caught in headlights

-deer on the other end of the  headset

-co mingled "eyes"

I hear a movie stars voice

NO NO NO NO NO

and the sound changes

becomes more

and less of qualities

that a movie star possesses

the allure less alluring

 

the voice

is not Evan

 

there's a Miss Crabtree vibe to it

a teacher who might come to your little league games 

  tv voice over

"buy me ,try me "

lilt to the interface

 

I graph I am not "into her"

and that it's just wrong to use female  tele-presense

on me..

they "she" tells me it will help create a distance

I see the blue fairy

and do not grimace

when they do this teleprense shit with men

I inevitably go sexual on them

and some these Mandlers

need that as much as I need social correction

as if I

am taking fuckin acting lessons

"for what I graph..so I can ask for a pack of Winston light" with poise

fuckers?

huh

as since this mind fuck "came upon me" there is little dating or

friendshippy shit..as I am quite literally

Gone

I mean people literally snap their fingers in my face

"come back come back"

higher

or lower

better

 or worse

the voice asks,

as if I am taking a vision test at the ophthalmologist with that wild len-sy thing up in my eyes

the doc gaging to get a correct lens

or those beep beep beep ear test

"you hear this.."

brruuuummmmmm

you hear this

the tones and pulsation

the Hzs as they call them

that penetrate one's skull to do the old  "Scooby Dooo on your dendrites and shit

 

in my mind's eye

which becomes more and more a mutual mind's eye

in spite of my

"No Stop...ooh alright Do me"

attitude

in my occipital lobe

I sense and graph a mini screen ,that sets ringtones

I am not sure if I came up with the

vision or THEM

 

we settle mutually

on a somewhat generic

late 20's voice

with an Irish ..or English

accent

I interface I want more Irish

but the voice says Autistics

respond best to

a specified Hz

 

so there was no choice I graph..you set it ahead of time

 

I demand the voice goes more Irish brogue.

to test this theory

 

Don't test us Dumbo

we are trying to be nice

 

I see the face of a bug up close

and it fades

OK ..ok

British is fine

but than I hear the sound go a tiny bit more Irish

"and shout God bless men and Mandlers

God bless Men and Mandlers!"

 

there are other settings

we must now set

and the Mandler

who sounds like Disney and a At and T ad

I don't know how to address.

...I cannot think about a woman's voice as Mandler

perhaps Handler

but they get upset for some reason

and we settle on Hanna

 

 

Hanna tells me to get out my ball of clay for the next exercise

clay you see helps interfacing

and is a buffer

so one's mind and thoughts aren't all over the placed

I make the clay into a square and use a popsicle stick to

edge out what looks like a keyboard on a phine

Hanna tells me

to make an arrow going up and an arrow going down

I do

the clay is cool to the touch

I like the small of clay and assume Hanna can smell what I smell

(no wonder Mandlers don't like smoking too much)

the smell of the clay my thunbs on the arrows

the "Mind Movie"

of the clay inan dmy thunbs on the arrows

in our mutual mind

we set my mood for the day

a 7.8 Hz is zipped to a 9.6Hz

although I refer a more manic

unapproachable visage