the smoked stimulant tests are actually remnants of the MERH CAT days when I believed  (or was lead to believe) the Brain Computer Interface was 'gifted" upon me because I was being trained to be a spy .

Before you judge me that only an idiot would be sucked into such a belief system you must realize that not only is one suddenly made aware their thoughts are being answered back in real time by a voice not their own is quite desperate to believe this intrusion is based on something worthy of such intrusion in the first place.

Upon hearing a voice not based upon either one's thought style nor the 'sound' of one's inner monologue one naturally assumes one is being recorded by either listening devices or cameras or both .

No. I did not tear apart the walls ,lamps ,lights and so forth as one sees many a person in such arrears does in films and television

but I assume i did appear as frantic and panicked  as one usually does not see except as depicted on TV 

and of course this reaction was also both maximized and tempered by my assumption I was  being viewed and indeed scrutinized by people who had spoken to me in a most unsual way that seemed to bypass my ears entirely 

certainly i thought this could not really be happening 

i had neither done a drug or drink to encourage such hallucinations 

Nor had I prayed to something or someone above the clouds nor beneath the ground to entice such a talking to 

but talked it did 

nonstop in fact 

and although I covered my ears

the sound of what ,of whom 

I did not know and still cannot be sure of 

was unstoppable