compo cola : monkeys/fatal vision

I refuse to write
"the monkey story"
and XXXX says ..well than I 'll write the monkey story for you
and that
the "Monkey Story"
and certain stories that have certain TRUTHS in them MUST also have MONKEYs and such in them

I tell him I do not understand.

"You do understand ..."he says ,holding my face close to him..doing this all "look me in the eye" shit

I try moving my head ..and moving my eyes ...but he won't let me

'You DO understand ," he says in a way that he might as well be holding up some spiral that goes round and round..

"you write it..I'm nobody's dog"I say

"which makes you what than?"XXXX says,his eyes all amused now..no longer ..all Svengali like

"what?" I ask.

"If YOU..
someone like you
who basically
is just Pinocchio...
is nobody's dog..
nobody's pet
nobody's project? when HE was only BORN to be a project than what is HE?huh?"XXXX asks..

"HE ,this HE is his own man is who he is.." I say and suddenly I feel my arm curl up...like a Charly horse. And next I feel a terrible pain in my elbow..my funny bone....next my balance ...my sense of balance. Something someone never ,ever thinks about ..just disappears. And I fall on the floor.

XXXX gets down on the floor in front of me ..like he's going to do a push up...

"Nobody's dog huh.." XXXX says sticking his finger in my mouth, "If you bite it Dumbo I swear I'll kick your fuckin' ribs in

he does what he does...
and than starts crying..
saying "why do I make him do these things, patting my hair.. wiping his "stuff" off my mouth..

"swallow it," Evan graphs

and I begin to feel pain ,elbow pain. That nerve..
and I swallow

and see XXXX somehow suddenly stop his crying and smile all wide saying

"and who says you can't teach old dogs new tricks"

than he pulls my ear real close to his mouth and say, "Thanks Evan".

and I throw up.

SA × SB → SB: (sA(t), sB(t)) → sB(t+1). sA here plays the role of the input of B. In general, B will not only be affected by an outside system A, but in turn affect another (or the same) system C. This can be represented by another a transformation T’: SA × SB → SC : (sA(t), sB(t)) → sC(t+1). sC here plays the role of the output of B. For the outside observer, B is a process that transforms input into output. By experimenting with the sequence of inputs sA(t), sA(t+1), sA(t+2), ..., and observing the corresponding sequence of outputs sC(t+1), sCt+2), sCt+3), ..., the observer may try to reconstruct the dynamics of B. In many cases, the observer can determine a state space SB so that both transformations become deterministic

(2)

the book of elroy

}Los Angeles 2011

Thu(rsday, October 4, 2012

i lay there

the trance like state

i hear things.
i see....

i am aware of the one million yard stare
my eyes now look tricky

i listen is what I do

(there was a time i thought I was IN something .Part of something exciting.a new
venture...)

the paintings i go back to now.

what began this .

(again)
the monitoring

I have been told I will be monitored like this the rest of my life.

Monday, October 8, 2012

Cole .week 25

sometimes it all goes to hell.

the "process"

i slip back to old ways.
looking in the mirror.
always a problem.
during Inter Neural.
or laying down too much
the weather changing.the cold setting in...the darkness.
i used in the last coupla weeks.
stuff i shouldnt have..

.staring endlessly at the giraffe poster that hangs on the wall
but
I don't want to reach
or study
or change
so I return to The Old Way

i turn away from them.
i spend hours on the computer....
a "targeted individual *"chatroom.
...
damn right /Evan graphs/ you were targeted.
every word you typed screamed ....somebody stop me.
somebody help me
somebody show me
The Way

the previous night.a slight pain.
my left arm
a reminder.

nothing to get worked up over.

just something to let me know.
that indeed
there were "angels"
above me
keeping me in line.

the old blog...

July 2 2011
I am getting all sundance movie my head .I hate this dumpy apartment.This dumpy life....I think if i had a wife and child right now.i would just leave in the middle of the night and never call them again .I would just send them money and after a while i wouldnt bother even sending that....

July 17 2011
I have a hard time with women artists.most of them especially the good ones are plain and simply evil.Women were not meant to toy with another's mind .Which is what art is.
A woman who can do this ,especially one who knows one can-Mary Clair says

Mary Clair 's last name is spelled with a K.

she wants me to call her MK

MK is dressed in a big floppy hat and a blonde wig .

MK says to me at the restaurant we meet at she likes dressing up and playing roles.

MK says today-for me she has dressed as the

"mystery woman" in" Fatal Vision", Joe Mcginnis' account of the officer who presumably murdered his wife.

Earlier on the phone we had spoken about how good some of the miniseries were in the early late 1980's.

MK says -- how Lifetime Movies of the early 1990's are the true masterpieces of modern cinema.

Nov 1 2011

"mary klair"is in "the industry"very easy to be around so long as you dont get too close

she's the one who said

if you .get close enuf to anyone and you see every pore and crack and trick and tic
of actors...
mary klair.

found me online..

like the people who brought me out to LA

found me

mary klair talks all mean about "The industry"

sometimes I think to see..how I will react..

she says

that all actors are sociopaths.when it comes down 'to it"

oR they wouldn't be able to mimick

how a person "acts"

mary K said that sociopaths cant very well change their tail feathers.so they might as well learn how to shake them properly.

and that's what movie making is all about.

(3)
I spent a good part of the day going over a previous blogs I had written when I first began

when IT first began

when they TOOK me.

when they "app-ed" me for writing online what Mary Klair said..

like IT WAS A TEST

like I had some how TAKEN MK

and made her mine

by writing down her words

but they brought me here to LA supposedly "to tell a story"from an

outsider

point of view....they told me before I came they woulkd Help write it

a "New Way"

that I would be "mentored" to learn how to tell a story

a New Way

I figured...

well

everything that I experience I can ....write about..

not as ..like "whatever story they wanted me to write" which I still don't understand..

so..i practice writing

online.cuz' it feels not so lonely is all

like I am writing not to some type writer but to

people who read

the facebook..

but they said DO NOT DO THIS

ever.

and I 'm like

I can do what I like.

this was before I realized ..yes I can do what I like but

boy will I pay for it...

with the "apps"

(4)

The Process
when i couldnt cope with it.moved back to philly thinking IT WOULD End..

but no..

one reason I agreed to leave Pennsylvania and move back to LA was ..

cuz' I had gotten hooked up with

the wrong people again

...the wrong people seem to be the only ones that stick out

like movies.

like live movies

the wrong people ...are..more than the supposed right ones ever seem to be...

seeing and hearing now the wrong people all day long..

nobody believes this is possible.

they made me their puppet somehow..

so I have every reason to do whatever I want

to exist.

meth
and coke....

to block it...to deal with it...

as firewall

from Mandlers...

they put them in my arm ..

after they booked me and locked me up on drug charges..

they set me up

like a movie.

now I am a movie..

a cartoon...

my art /the art "about " Hollywood."

was taken as against Hollywood or something..

or there's something more. here

the stuff they tell me

that I was born to be

in this maze...

....

that I had free choice...and always took the wrong path

like in those odd little tracts that Jehovah witnesses give you

that's how damn scary this is.

it's like they created an alternative reality

but decided not to make paradise..but hell

maybe for some

for people who "went through the maze " the right way

they made heaven

I don't want to die

but this is not true

but not yet.

and

nOT FOR THEIR crummy experiment

crack makes me ...still so still ...like not even a single neuron transmits..

some people get all talky on coke

some people get all frozen .

I am the Frozen kind.

(4)
the journals.
my scrawlings
against the New Way
against my mentors
against my parents.( the style of the times....but not their times...in the New Way we don't denounce or dredge up incidence best left alone for the sake of a good sentence...we turn away from such books and films...and most of all thinking....look what it has done.to the Enway.to your way and mine....look around you ...what have we done?)
stop writing if the words you write further THEIR cause.
what happens to the "hipster"
when the hipster turns 50
the need to be young and current
will they not inevitably envy their own children's "nowness"
their children
who main goal will be to move miles and miles from them.
this is what we must change Evan graphs

nasty nasty bits about my childhood when we were working to
"get rid of it"
half written sentences.of rage ,lunacy,madness,sadness...I wondered.
and not for the first time.
why they even bothered.
saving my life.

the New Way is strict.
parental.
"cruel to be kind"
but not always
"in the right measure.."

I must trust completely
that they know best

they are ahead. of the times.
...

against
against

always up against...

The new guy who has moved into the complex.
also in the New Way
Tad.
He looks, moves and speaks like television.

tv watching
... the comparisons I make ...towards fictions.
the comparisons i unconsciously make towards the less than one percent attarctive and enticing enuf to be actors in fictions.
if i am not looking at their flawless beauty and grace i am looking at their furniture..or clothes.
or comparing my socialness or lack there of to a beer commercial

and there are things I never write of.
that are out of this world.
I am never alone.
nor would I want to be .

ever again

---------------------------------


	*Targeted Individuals are people who are illegally and covertly harassed, abused, gang-stalked and spied upon 24/7 by organized groups of persons. There are several reasons why people become targets and they usually have something to do with sex and money, in that order. The targeting may have to do with a messy divorce, child custody, unrequited love, whistle-blowing, revenge, differences in social, political, or religious beliefs, etc. Targeting for monetary reasons can include anything from denying you social security benefits or workmen's comp. to outright stealing from your bank account, from sexual slavery to embezzelment, and so on. Targets should vehemently resist all attempts at being denied any and all kinds of government benefits. Appeal any bad decisions and if you don't like the next decision, appeal it again. Another claim being made and that is that people might be being targeted for experimental reasons by the military or security agencies, usually, to test out how certain mind-control techniques and weapons work, which goes back to money or sexual slavery. The main purpose of the assaults is to discredit and control targets. Harassment and abuse is often set up by corporations, businesses, organized criminals, street gangs, right-wing extremists, doctors, dentists, lawyers, or anyone who stands a chance of making any money off of targets. Targeted Individuals are often hit with gassing (blowing noxious bio/chemical fumes into the target's environment) and they are attacked psychologically, as well. These abuses often lead to the need for psychological and physiological medical attention, thereby providing a good cash flow for the medical community and for big pharma., while taking care of someone's personal problem at the same time.

------------------2--------------------------------------------------------------

Kevin wasn’t working out.
Not since his brother had come to town.

According to Valerie
he needed a lesson
a reminder who his true family was

Dome wasn’t something one spoke about
not to outsiders

The 9 Hz focused extreme low frequencies waves* from the graffitied van outside Kevin's apartment this time was focused on the posterior region of Kevin''s hypothalamus .

As expected the excitation caused by the transmission triggered calcium ions **to build up and than release into Kevin’s blood stream.

Causing muscle contractions from head to toe.

The damage would be irreversible after 8 minutes.

Instant Parkinson’s Disease
Generalized Dystonia of the trunk and limbs

"let him twitch," Valerie said ,as his mentors had upon hearing that Kevin had spoken out and against intraneural interface and

the Dome towers being constructed around the city

Kevin lay in bed.unable to move.

A feeling like pins and needles,than as if an electrical current was passing through and inside his body.

His face tightened and swelled

His arms jerked about as the smooth muscles of his young body were overcome with stimulation.*

"stop ,stop""Kevin thought ,graphed as loud and as sincerely as he could to his neural mentors."please,please,:he graphed.

I will do anything.Anything you say"

and it stopped.

Since ELF is not found naturally, and is only used for maritime communication, its presence proves used on the general public..... scientific documents showing the devastating effects of ELF broadcast by microwave, UHF and VHF on humans.

pulse modulated microwaves (as used for mobile phones) can, when modulated with ELF which mimics specific brain patterns change the behaviour of the victim at the flick of a switch. A vast catalogue of control frequencies in the MHz range, FM radio, TV and mobile phone frequencies, have been measured, 147, 153, 197, 199, 447, 453, 456, 466, 853, 883, 884, 887... Symptoms can be depression, befuddled thinking, loss of memory, stress, not being able to cope, manic behaviour, schizophrenia, nervous breakdowns, physical collapse, brain and nervous system damage, heart attacks, cancer...

Contacting researchers in this field of enquiry, they all complain of microwave-like symptoms, headache, nausea, giddiness, eye damage, ear problems... Readings I have taken show that the 750-1000 MHz range is used by ...services for inducing nervous and physical collapse. Microwave ovens give off 1000 MHz.

highly deniable, device for civilian control.

Precisely modulated microwave radiation is used to influence brain function. Human behaviour and reactions can be entirely controlled by using pulse modulated microwave EM radiation. Pulse modulated microwaves are useful as the carrier for signals as they are able to pass through the skull, which is rather resistant to low level EM. The massive number of microwave antennae that dot the country, some of which are used for the microwave phone network, all use pulse modulated microwaves, which makes their use..against the civilian population in times of trouble, or rioting, crucial to modifying the behaviour of the general population. This pulse modulated microwave carrier beam can then be used to carry signals. These signals are extremely low frequency recordings of brain electrical potentials, which have been recorded by neuro-medical researchers such as Dr Ross Adey.

Dr Ross Adey's research at the Brain Research Institute of the University of California, ...a catalogue of different brain signals for specific actions, emotions and pathological states of mind were recorded. It was found that when microwaves were used to fire these signals at victims' brains, they experienced the moods, behaviour, and the pathological states, carried by the signals. This meant that by mimicking natural brain frequencies, the human brain could be controlled remotely by use of extremely low frequency broadcast carried by pulse modulated microwave beams (ELF pulse modulated microwave remote mind control technology).

Paralysis can be induced in the target by use of this method of broadcasting preparatory sets encoded on microwave beams. A pulse modulated microwave beam, carrying an ELF signal, which is identical to the one in the motor neurone centre of the brain, is used to jam the victim's motor co-ordination. .analogous to radar jamming,..literally overloads the brain, so it cannot control the body. Pulse modulated microwavewhich broadcast the ELF preparatory sets of the motor cortex at the victim, will paralyse the victim without killing them. Breathing and heartbeat are involuntary actions controlled by another set of frequencies in another part of the brain.

.... Sophisticated computer systems have learnt to read the sub vocalised thoughts in the brain, by associating a specific brain excitation potential, with a particular word. .. Once the donkey work of finding the specific frequencies for all the words in a language has been programmed into a super computer, which can carry out massive parallel processing, software is used to match this with real world excitation potential associated with sub vocalised thought obtained from thousands who are used to calibrate the synthetic telepathy devices.

Synthetic telepathy detects the l5Hz, 5 milliwatt auditory cortex brain emissions, that are linked with the excitation potentials in the brain associated with subvocalised thought. New technology, involving low frequency microwaves and RF, has enabled devices to be built which can scan through walls and look inside peoples' bodies like X-rays. This enables security personnel to see a target in his own home and to track him throughout the house. Further to this, being able to see inside the victim's head, would allow computer controlled targeting of specific brain centres in the victim's brain, even when he was walking around the house.

Adey found that by using 0.75mW/cm² intensity of pulse modulated microwave at a frequency of 450 MHz, it was discovered that an ELF modulation could be used to control all aspects of human behaviour.

., stressing the neural network by constant calcium ion efflux and interference with bio electric fields.

With the advent of synthetic telepathy, 'CCTV of the mind' becomes a reality.

[1] Non-Lethality: John B Alexander,
[3] Enigma Vol 2, It's All In The Mind, T Rifat.

[4] Ross W Adey