Wednesday, April 2, 2014

"the seventh day"(Targeted Individual; Aaron Abramson)


I fight against it

attempting to out- run IT
out -think IT

to
 outlast IT

my interface

an interface I never asked for
but was tethered with just the same

imagine
a never ending phone call with an ex lover who has little to say that's positive ,beneficial or enlightening in any way..

a never ending phone call made further
unpleasant
in that the phone has been jammed into your ear so far up the ear canal  it has as if by magic weaved it's mouth piece into the part of your brain that thinks.
you can no longer censor what you say...every crude, rude comment you think is conveyed to the party line uncensored..
further more
 the camera on this "smart phone" shoved so deep inside your ear canal  . has attached itself to your visual cortex..
.the party line now sees what you see and and think
...
that in a nut shell in brain computer interface



My court ordered enrollment with The New Way and the Science-ideology styling's of my Direct Neural Link to  my wards whose job it is
is to Resolve Me
my Mentors  work feverishly
trying to remold me with Neuro linguistics
and
courseload...upon course load of "how to be' recorded lessons
 by founding Father of The  Neuronautics  Method , Gary Rainy

24/7 remote monitoring of my every thought and pre neural firing 
24/7 corrections
by electronic "hazing"
 to scare away the various  barnacles and living  ghouls that have attached themselves to my "Didactic Mind"

my Mentors"who are at this very moment listening ,transcribing and replying to all that I think and type..

I slip on head phones 
I turn on the fan .
I place a blindfold upon my eyes...so the visuals I see cannot be correlated to my organic sight...let my Occipital Over- lays be based on the blackness ..I see before me..
for I am not winning.
my mind and heart have blackened
I am not resolvable
nor good enough
for The New Way
and don't they Know it

  I can  fight  the INPUT
the aural and occipital overlays
but
there is no way to fight the OUTPUT
or thought transcriptions

 


I didn't sign up for this.
or more so didn't know what I was signing up for
.when I opted for early releases on their own recognizance (RTOR)
I assumed it was a typo
I have had some unfortunate brush ups
 with the law
in my rather short time on earth.. I am 26..
and assumed
I was  (ROR)
-released on my own recognizance

for I did not know
at the time
 their was any other type of
recognizance
to be "released upon"

I should have stayed in the county jail
should have served a regular sentence

..shoulda stayed on the farm..shoulda ..listened to my old man...

(my g-d .
.do the mentors hate my thinking "my g-g-g-gay way..." being lost in pop songs and reverie. Or what they call Self Referentials


I feel a sharp pain on my left arm.
a wave.a pulse. a cue
a reminder
r to not taunt my Mentors,my tele-operators  with extraneous or instigating thoughts.

one day I must tell you about
my hospitalization
in a Memphis Psych ward
for daring to think too long about
just what it means in the scheme of existential Ezistenz

... that INDEED- there ain't no Coup de Ville
Hiding at the bottom of a Cracker Jack box..
.
over and over did I attempt to assimilate this notion of the unfair unfairities of desire ,want and reality ..penned by Marvin Lee Aday otherwise known as Meatloaf


I just wanted to smoke.

if it were not for my addiction to tobacco I might never have been so eager to "sign" away my self ...on someone else's recognizance


I didn't mind county jail
I assumed my minor felony ,breaking a beer mug on some one's head would not cause me to to serve prison time,as the little piece of glass in the so called victim's eye was removed with out incident...
or scraping of the retina

he threw the first punch by the way
calling me a "Jew Faggit.." which I am..

I reckon
I was drunk and had somehow mixed and displayed both my Jew -like mannerisms whatever they might be
and my homosexual mannerisms ..although I was unaware I exuded much homo-esque  harbingers
in fact
I assumed I had
taken on many new
traits that were quite the counterpart of my non unique traits of urban aesthete no homo or "hey jew' than the crowd I had previously considered
"my tribe"

an unfortunate stream of events forced me out of my element of the upwardly hands free mobile set
into
my "slumming it "phase of world traveler
making lemonade out of lemons I now sought the rich poor offerings of " Happy Wanderer "

glad
 to be free of the hassles of rent ,car and utility payments...
since losing both of my jobs
due to
a rather
incidental, than incremental  meth problem
that
threw me
' a tad off course

I had no true course
 prior to
"the problem
I convinced myself 'I had begun to think .and one thinks a lot going this way and that on a greyhound bus .that one must also take for lodging...the bus becomes one's dwelling when one is homeless
and the movement of the bus
is often the only sense
of moving forward one has

it feels like
a job
to be
on a bus.
I had taken to sketching the trees and truck stops and houses and highways outside the window to make it even moreso-a job..

as I had moved forward ...one town to another
I felt I was On Track.On course
the feeling of being off track and off course I had decided
 was probably why I vied for the snort  of a seemingly  "course-ful' existence
the meth made
every activity seem purposeful
and eventful...

my eviction furthered my adventures into a world of un known awakenings
as I had little
to do but GO
my friends  who had have enough of me said "just go"
my parents who had had enough of me"said Get Out!"

if there was ever an opportunity to
remake myself and perhaps make a mark upon the world it was now

the world was my oyster!

my wings  were now the trot ..stop plot
of Greyhound

my bed .
an old High Scholl letter sweater stolen from an ex who had stolen it himself from some jock he knew and loved (or should I say "hoved" as in hovered over in high school..)
like he hovered his
"hove" for
the jock over me
during his long sighs
before during ,after and sometimes during sex.

as I was not .you see his .
true match.

I suppose all this was piddling around my meth-ed up mind
during a particularly long bus jaunt (only 1 short smoking period) between Elkins and Wheeling, West Virginia

so of course
I "lost it when called
a jew faggit
who accidentally spilled a bit of Bud Lite on some alpha Nail
good old boy dressed as some southern take on Drake


with due and much undoing process I was shambled over to the local police station
and placed in a cell

for the first time in weeks I had a room "of my own"
and a nice flat bed.

I was afraid the temporary comfort
might make me
a little to soft for the greyhound trip to Bountiful and Beyond that lay before me...

little did I know that my stay would
undo what ever course
I had presumed the world not only offered but owed me

the misdemeanor
concerning
the smash of a glass half full upon
Bob's big Boy's noggin
was taken not as a reflexive action performed independent of my self to stave off any further anti Semitic or homophobic taunts
but as Aggravated Assault

like an angel
a social worker type
in 60% cotton 40$ blended luminous white
appeared before me
with "Good News'
about a new regional 
Release Program
that would essentially abate my sentence to time served

all I had to do with
drink "the Kool Aid'

yes.

I assumed the damn drink contained some tranquilizer..
I assumed that the effects might be long term
I just wanted a cigarette

I was free. I had signed the forms before drinking the Kool Ade.that I assume made the county etc in no responsible for any effects whatever was in the drink might ..be

I was told not to drive or do much of anything at all for the next 7 days as that would be how long it would take for the effects of the
experimental procedure would take to kick in

"what experimental Procedure? I remember thinking I had swallowed a cup of fucking juice..
they were kind enough to set me up for a week at a nearby
Best Western placed.
I was driven to by
my white knight in poly blend

he gave his card and said he'd be back in a week ..when
"it kicked in"

I wanted to ask ,"when what kicked in" but all I wanted was sleep some cigs and some -

"i wouldn't recommend you partaking in any street drugs..not with that stuff in you.."

he said...as if reading my mind..
...
"with what stuff in mye ?"I asked.

"I can't talk about it he said..

you all put something in my drink that "you" can't talk about..." I said..

he became nervous ,and told me again he'd be back in 7 days...and if there was an emergency under no circumstances go to a hospital.do you understand...just call me"

"whatever I said..."as I couldn't wait to get away from this increasingly odd man<"can I at least drink?: I asked..

"I think so..but moderation. And no hitting anyone over the head with mugs.."

***************************************************************************
                                                            THE SEVENTH DAY


in the beginning (including I usually so quite in the know of whatever  t is "trending
had not a clue
 where
or what or who
 these New Voices only I could  hear.
These wild new Visions only I  could  see.were coming from

am I anointed? I thought
am I to soon be making steams appear at a grotto  on dusty hills seeing Elijah. us jews take on The First Coming...
I saw myself as some male version of Jennifer Jones..wandering around Wheeling West Virginia telling anyone I could about the majesty I saw before me..

a 6 foot tall vision of gorgosity
in a blue  shirt a black tie and dark tan slacks.

in his hand he held a book called 'Inway to the Enway"
a book I remember from my youth being
advertised on tv ...
claiming to hold the answers to all of life's problems

the commercial began with a giant landslide. Or tidal wave or eruption of some kind...
as if the book itself
was so powerful it could
cause all manner of change and rebirth..

I attempted to touch the man
but my hand went through his visage
still
he had made quite an impression...
I had been alone for so long in that moldy room
with only the company of the tv and magazines
I asked the "man" ,the vision
 if he could use a rub down ...his shoulders were so broad and I could not help but notice the  way his trousers  barely contained ...another Inway to the Enway

I felt a shrill buzz in my ear..as if punishing me for my sexual desire
and the apparition went as fast as it appeared

"come back .comeback " I remember thinking...

.and than a strange feeling came over me

that same feeling one gets
when one knows
someone is watching them or standing behind them

but this feeling had not to do with

sensing there was someone
in the room
but someone or something
in my head
was
watching.
listening
to my every thought



had I found g-d
by refraining from partaking...
or was I reacting to the drug that had been put into my Kool Aid as part of my Released on Their own Recognizance

I quickly called poly cotton .
the social worker
who told me whatever happened .do not go to the emergency room

....in less than 10 minutes Ryan was at my door.

"so the nano kicked in...good.I'm happy for you...this is a good thing..May I come in..?"

I noticed in his hand was the Book

the very same book
my "apparition had in it's hand "Inway to The Enway"

He saw me looking at the book...

"A marvelous group...a marvelous way for potentially Resolvables like yourself to at least try to resolve themselves.*.."

"and if I cannot as you say be "resolved'?I asked,still strangely  aware that  my thoughts seemed "open'...transmitted...somehow...judged

"you don't want to know,"A voice said ,a Voice that sounded nothing like Ryan's ...a voice that did not come out of Ryan's closed mouth

'it's scary
in the beginning...I too was a Ruiner
before I found The New Way",Ryan said handing me "Gary Rainy's Inway to the Enway"


*
Methods and systems for inducing behavior in a population cohort
US Patent  8150796 B2
Streszczenie
, computer program products, devices and systems are described that carry out identifying a member of a population cohort; and inducing at least one behavior in the member of the population cohort based on an association between the population cohort and at least one cohort-link

 The system  includes a device which measures and induces physiologic activity which may in turn include brain activity measurement
 
various data querying and/or recall techniques with respect to output of physiologic activity measurement unit 310, and/or output of association unit 340, respectively, in order to for example, obtain, identify, and/or transmit various  searching techniques to match the mental state of the member of population  may be facilitated.
Measuring at least one physiologic activity of a member of population cohort and may include measuring magnetic, electrical, hemodynamic, and/or metabolic activity in the brain.
Magnetoencephalography
One method of measuring at least one physiologic activity may include measuring the magnetic fields produced by electrical activity in the brain via magnetoencephalography. Synchronized neuronal currents induce very weak magnetic fields that can be measured by magnetoencephalography parallel to the surface of the head that project measurable portions of their magnetic fields outside of the head.measuring the electrical activity of the brain by recordingf post-synaptic potentials: those which are generated in superficial layers of the cortex.
 One of the most robust features of the ERP(evoked potential response)  is a response to unpredictable stimuli. This response is known as the P300 (P3)
Measuring at least one physiologic activity of a member of population cohort  may also include measuring metabolic or hemodynamic responses to neural activity

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