good.thinking.

I think of little else
but of  Evan

today he actually assumed the shape of my grandfather who had  passed away years ago

midway down the street
 he morphed into an ex boyfriend I lost contact with
nothing strange about  occipital overlay

but
what was
odd
was
he
or
they back at Home Office
 also  adjusted my moods

appropriated them

so they "went with"
 both semblance's/.both images/.Both people

it's hard to think of a biosensor induced cued "mind's eye" visual
which I see
as the mind's eye sees
in 3-d
a cluster of nearly 4,000 nano scaled bio "chips" have latched upon my posterior parietal cortex .even if I were to have my eyes injured(or poked out like they always joke)  I could still see.

the problem is

I see what they want me to see..

and sometimes that's quite a problem indeed

 while it may be easy to ignore what you hear
it is impossible to ignore what they can make you feel or see.
remember that old Flintstones cartoon where some mad scientist can make Barney and Fred cry like babies by aiming like a mini laser beam at them..it's like that..
or in the movie cabin in the woods when those guys /who have wired the cabin with
"stuff" can make that actress go all sexual for no reason?
it's like that..
sometimes it's cool
but they can turn it on you in weird disturbing ways

imagine if they decide to have a practical joke
and make you all suddenly heighten sexually when you're having a dinner  your mother for instance..
in minutes
you're undone
you think you can never see your mother again
these Mandlers are a bunch a" crack -ups
ha ha ha
very funny

you mighta seen what they can do with some of them Proxy they aggressive up..
one minute their the nicest kids in town next their pickin off pedestrians outside an Applebees

the visual overrides
sometimes
they seem so much like people
I now have to do double takes
and sometimes when they're really wicked the make the imagery so close.
you feel claustrophobic
every 6 months or so they learn new shit..
and bein a Guinea Pig
my shrink says I should think positive about my being an "urban astronaut'

so I am a Winnie Pig..!
my doc knows
about it
a lot of folks do..
the companies trying to both make "armory ' shit
and make use of this junk for private citizens...
not easy
as they can't really pretend this shit aint HERE when a 2017 prototype of this insert
is already in the works
they'll play it close to the vest..
sell it
like they sell
the Watcher's
Inside time
sorta "Sliver" meets "The elephant Man"
get inside this
scumbag and see what he sees.feel his breaking heart and spirit...just pop on the headset
"can I make him do things?"
the consumer might ask..
Like what they might say

"can I make him cluck like a chicken?"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

people do not see what  I see hear what I hear
or believe me about the "apps"

I am always with "a form of personhood"
with the interface and overlays but
also less and less with people...that are flesh and blood
tele presence is like being there but more so
as they know you ..in a different way
they know what you think
not what you "are"

I disagree with Neuronautics that I am what I think not who I am with vocalized thoughts and actions..i too used to think the soul was in the mind..
but now I think it's in the part of a person even direct neural interface cannot touch..

them
what ever life I had
is slipping

I spend my days with them..

listening
seeing

"playing"
learning
I want another type of existence beside immersive Reality..
and education about The New Way

The toll
It is taking is showing and growing ..I am not a good learner I am fighting them...
I sometimes feel they are taking me over
or taking me
more and more into the point of view  of the new Way
the interfaces are open ..
I glean from my mentors the new way is much more than self help and self evolution but something mightier..
they want more

much more
I understand wanting more
but I don't empathize with them
they want to run things
their way
they feel they are being run over by the runners
and want to run

but more they want to win
they want to let it all out
their philosophies in a devil may care fashion(Valerie Prentiss's graphs not mine}
with us

 

or against us


'we want to know
we need to know
in advance
(advance of what..I graph and receive nothing )
they want to make an example a certain types,they state...let them make an example of themselves..
just give them a pen and paper and let them SHOW
how sick
they are
(I never understand what EVAN is saying when he gets worked up about some Big Event..or what they Call The Big Happening that will solve all of the Problems once and for ONCE!..
the system, the infrastructure can no longer bear
the burdens!
so say I so say the right of us...he says ,he interfaces with a snicker..
I know I not Right
but I know he is trying to cure me

 the
bare basics of
civilization which have taken over a thousand  years to lay down...all wired, all paved..
and now there's just too many people walking on the pavements..
we don't need them
"it's like I woke up one morning and said

why are all these ruiners here."EVAN confided

they. have been built the cities.. dug out airstrips
no we just gotta get them out of here

and put them where?I graph
why do they need to go anywhere............what are u graphing about ..Dumbo
no one is speaking to you as anything but a

(he stops)
but a what?



In quick succession I see a series of frowning overlays seemingly
On
In
Over
Every crease ,indent,shadow,outline

My eyes
What I see
Only
A
Chiaroscuro

A primer

An undercoat
For my mentors
To reflect
My own state of mine

The "story"
HA!
Or more so my ever running consciousness
Has taken
Such
Turn for "the dark"

Am I really to presume
By my mentored sensibility...I can rarely anymore tell
Where EVAN 's  mindset equipment and the thoughts that travel through his emotiv headset
To
Toward
At
In
Over and
In and for and to and again like a möbius

Stop!
EVAN interfaces
Stop
And think
What you are presenting

About whom
I think and therefore graph therefor interface
At my mentor

I attempt to think as "if" I am more like
THEM

"That is all we ask,
I sense
And see
The
Frowning world around me
Turn upside down
by remote
occipital
overlay

"Goooood ...gooood thinking"Evan graphs
delivering a gold star
which 'appears" too much like a patch one might sew upon one's person

Opps!,Evan graphs
reformatting the gold star into
less associative
renderings