moonshadow

they
do not particularly like me..
explaining The Process..



the techniques


or  the "technicians"
on
     the other side of the interface


          they do not like me thinking of myself as a human Guinea Pig.
(they prefer the term Urban Astronaut)
             or comparing their "work" to
                            the "work" done on mental patients and the indigent
in the 1950's and 1960's concerning Mind Augmentation

                            their
                                  protocol
                                              is simple
is the jist

think in a clean
clear and conscientious manner at all times
                                                        and never call it Mind Control
it's about teaching YOU how to control
your own mind

using the principals of Gary Rainy and the TruGenic Movement
which
as scary as it sounds ...TruGenics..
sounds a fuck of alot better
than The Transhuman Movement
all the rage in southern California
the next Gold Rush

                              all about behavioral alterations
in my "case"
(and that is what I am to THEM
a case)
 concerning
     drug "abuse"issues
                   "it's about a cure...'
it's about systemics
and sometimes ..
                                       it's about scaring me  to sobriety
but
if you ask me..
IT
is
 about
 any fucking thing they make up on any given day...

and do not let the "lightness" as of this entry fool you
these Mentors
are gonna kill me
in Real Time
I've become a "problem"
more expendable than dependable
I never planned to live that long anyway
and i sure as shit did not count on
being a Cybernetic
puppet
to some god damn "group" that seems to
be able to do any thing they want in the state of Cal-i FORM ya

EVAN sends a zing
across my auditory nerve
and insinuates
 if it were not for them
not for Neuronautics
that I would be in a correction facility right now

it would have been preferable

i often think

I am not fair to THEM
perhaps

They do try
thing is THEY seem
 to be trying out every possible use for A.I and brain Computer Interface
imaginable
as if
BCI and immersive Reality
were
peanuts
being diversified and modified by George Washington Carver

of course They Are making it up as "we" move along is the jist when I simply do not want "to play"
we?...

i am a passenger in my own skin
an living flesh avatar for these "Futurions"and "New Pharoes"of the west
forgive me
if my sense of humor has been replaced
lately by
contempt.

EVAN explains that sobriety
often
brings up misplaced emotions

and i "graph" back
no
Direct Neural Interface
brings up "misplaced emotions...

"but you love it sometimes
but you love it sometimes..."Evan zings

I had boyfriends
I used to go out with
or at least fuck around and stay in with
who were
abusive..
.liked to push me around ..push my buttons
who knows why
that's the type I went for


"and still do," EVAN graphs...

their job it sometimes seems
        to keep me so off kilter
                   always guessing
            who set me up for this,who found me in human enough
to "play"Psychotronic badmitten with these Frat BoY sadists
the..Mandlers?


I am not the Group type
                           yeah I attended some sessions..took some Neuronautic courses way back
back when an "audit"
a
"reading"
a "confessional"

was face to face
not mind to mind

the guy who manned the storefront that promised a  virtual volcano of instant karma and cosmic evolution with out dope

and yeah

i began writing about a specific group,self help group

in perhaps an "unstately" manner

and yes
rather than serve a sentence in CA..for
meth......"issues'
I agreed to
something I didn't understand.........

"you're doing it again "..,Evan graphs

he .they

despise pondering

or intellectualizing

it ruins The Enlightenment
the Wonder of A.I. and Immersive Reality
and the wonder of Neuronautics
and
EVAN

the system demands a respect

i cannot often give it..

"it is what it is.."is all i get

dig it

or start digging your own grave

is the emmitance

 that goes through me

pure thought

 

without a need for words

 

 

It's The New Way

 

and for me

there is no way out

of it

I owe them

is "the company line'

if nothing else

 

 

"tiny violins " appear in my sight.
you wouldn't be able to see them
the sight thing
works by by-passing the visual cortex

i can't help but smile at the violins
the tiniest violins in the world
overlapping my occipital lobe

that no one can see

but me