2 REPORTS IN TWO WEEKS .ONE FROM A "'Gazer" AT THE 48TH STREET STOP OF THE SUBWAY AND THE OTHER
A BUS DRIVER ROUTE17
CON-CERN-ING erratic-A CISM
OF GUESS WHO?
My shrink says
He says PUPIL CORNEA CONFIGURATION cause FOR causation...*
Data acquisition system for precision eye-fixation studies
M.BUCHSBAUM
A system has been developed to sense and record eye point-of-gaze for on-line computer processing, using a Mackworth camera in conjunction with a closed-circuit television system. System optics and electronics are described, together with computer software for system calibration and automatic artifact removal.
The difference between looking you in the eye and looking at the tip of your nose (a difference in point-of-gaze as small as 0.75 deg) can be detected by human in face-to-face contact . Studies of individual differences in perceptual and cognitive behavior(e.g.,Gardner & Long, 1962) and in the sequencing of eye fixations for pattern recognition (Noton & Stark, 1971) suggest the need for a system that enables the investigator to determine where a S is looking, how long he gazes,and where he looks next. Relatively accurate vertical and horizontal coordinates, as well as the length of time that they eye remains directed at a point, are needed in a form that conveniently allows statistical analysis.
In addition, precise control of stimulus delivery and convenient calibration procedures are necessary. The vertical and horizontal coordinates of point-of-gaze have generally been measured with motion picture recording techniques, the system becomes readily adaptable to a number of such machines without constructing special-purpose digital input interfaces. Eye position is indicated on the television monitor by a single bright spot produced by a virtual image of the light source
I tell the doc...it's THEM
it's merge
doing the over ride
THE DOC SNAPS BACK AND YELLS" I KNOW THEY SHOW YOU THINGS BUT OTHERS AREN'T SUPPOSE TO KNOW ABOUT Merge
or cybernetics
(they got it locked up
...the Neuronauts ..
'borrow" the technology
from the company THEY started .
...and since the tech is soooo.'sick"
they have an interest in keeping the "husk" they laid the Dots on quiet..
I don't say that to the doctor
I think it
...when I am busy or "engaged" with another...the mentors don't interface....they listen...
to not hear the Mentors...to at least feel they aren't reading me...is a pleasure.
I feel "cured" temporarily..
one doesn't realize what a luxury it was to have one's own mind as one's own that could not be
"fitted" towards
input output cybernetic "re -integration"
the doctor's main job
.
NOW
that I got the Dots in me
is more to manage "the dots"
more
than me
meaning his job is to
help me.
manage
the Merge
but it isn't working
there's no phones in his office......they're in a corner tied with cord...
he asks me to leave my cell phone outside the office...
so many mugs ,clocks ,pens and clocks with the Merge logo on them...what's the big secret than..
"Talkin to you mentors?" he says,"in that sick way I hear...."
"It's not called talking ..it's called Graphing. Or Merging ....minds don't speak to each other ..with Merge they think to one another.
I explain I don't think to them in a sick way..
I just think my own thoughts and they ...
comment on them..
the doctor says----"what they do is mirror your cognitions. back to you in "formats" so you and Merge might better understand ."Understanding"...everybody wins. They get to understand how Cybernetics works. And you get to be made aware of your thought style ...so you might change them..."
"that sounds good..doctor..but ..it's not quite like you say.."
"I UNDERSTAND THAT SOMEONE IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE SAYING ANYTHING AT ALL ...ABOUT THIS ...
(not quite legal not quite illegal ..somehow....)I GOTTA WARN YOU the doctor sighs MERGE AND NEURONAUTICS have a way of TAKEN' CARE OF Squealers
and Squeakers
ALL YOU ARE TO ME IS A STUDY,,,i made sure all of your documents say schizophrenic...but you gotta help me out here OK?
maybe he sees I get a sad look on my face...
Listen he says...trying to at least act like he likes me....;"I've gone out of my way to not present our sessions as Touchy Feelie
I have never displayed false regard upon you...I thought that you respected that..
I did I say(although I wonder) I do I say.
so..he says
so,I say back
"so quit fuckin things up...Sunglasses he says
"Even at night?" I say
he says -at night ,at mid day,at morning,till you get your wandering eye shit figured out.
you can't be gazing around seemingly staring at things nobody else sees
OR IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?
to get others to look at what you're looking at...
as if they'll see.
what you did ...
or you do you enjoy just looking like a wacko
I can't help but wonder I think a the same time I hear a beep
if the shrink talks to his other patients like this
I guess I was looking down when thinking this.i always seem to have my head down when the dr wells at me about how "i use" the dots..
I hear the dr,,,,clear his throat....and look up and see him wearing a bio sensor- ed headset..
"NO I don't treat my other patients like this.." he says taking off the headset..
"because my other patients have some common sense.."
the doctor sees me looking at the headset...the same headset he has shown me before....A Headset that reads my thoughts...
he says there are Merge employees who do nothing at all but read read read what I am thinking all all all day..
and I don't don't don't seem to change at all.
no matter how many
over rides they do to TRY TRY TRY to fix me.
fix me I say
they're not trying to fix me...
they're trying to kill me
"challenge you perhaps>"
he says
no ...no...I say. showing him my note book
...he glances at the book
and says.
and what made you think you had the right to write this down?The Dr Said..
....lemons .
you
lemons I
leeeemons leamurs chat tat racky shack back
lingo linear linlone
a pp le king
a p pl e c art...ma-gna mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmarta
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
I am not up for this.I am barely up..i can barely wake up....
I think for a moment of dissolving the Seroquel and Haldol
into water and pour the concoction both over the tv and radio..
to \
treat the
hallucinations coming from the box
the
words mean nothing..
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
lose meaning.... wake up and wonder why and realize ..what if ,,
others
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
got these pills mmm
and these...punishments?
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
the voice says...in varying pitches
c minor b flat f sharp g major.
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
... neuronautikkks want all people "like me" in an institution permanently
then used to just send big guys in leather jackets around....and put dirt in your gas tank and write notes to your employer that ......
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
would discredit
you
it was Raven DeClaridge ..and Gary Rainy that made this program.
so much cheaper than the goon squad.
I think of Gary Rainy near the pool...all pale..
and I get a pain on my head.
they can make out the imagine my mind....an unflattering one.
if I must think of GR I must think of the Picture of GR ...he wants displayed in the annexes ...
I think again of him wrong....at the pool...at the "ranch"
I can't help it..I am not goading the
machine..
or what I'm suppose to think of as ENTITIES after me for leaving "the group" and having SOME variance of NERVE
to write
NERVE the voice says fagggggit!you wanta se nervrve ...
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
played ..
sang
and screamed
for the next hours
YOU GONNA BE GOOD!a second voice says....you gonna GET ON BOARD or you gonna be fagitman ingrate
I wonder why they closed down the mental institutions that housed "vague cases"
I am a vague case of ODD ...of weirdo...of sick...
the voice begins doing the rhyme thing ..
and the tone ...
and even the nonsensabilities of the words. Well at least they rhyme ....and the rhyme that my group pulses...
are like gifts.
for one word sounding like another ...has a logic other wise missing ..
the sounds and it began meaning so little ...nothing as organism awake.s we make him not want to wake
a soft sell of loony
a sally sells seeshells down the seeshore thing.....
..
Obviously they felt in necessary to SHOW YOU what they could do IF They are forced to deal with a -the dr says...handing me back the notebook
all we're here to work on is .
you not making a spectacle of yourself with OUR
not YOUR equipment OK...what happens between you and your mentors...should stay between you and your mentors....not written down...not type out..how would you like if they gave your neural signals and recordings and the transcriptions of those signals to others?
the dr looks down at his own papers now .a gazer on route 17 reported that "the subject appeared, well.as a subject"...he looks at me....
"do you know how serious this is? do you care?"
"no " I think....and I am aware that I will pay for this later with perhaps another coupla hours of LINKYLALE LUDDITES or whatever...
"Yes" I say ,"I do care..."
"and why do you care?" he says
"I care because this technology can one day help people with locked in syndrome and dementia and people who...."
"YOU DON'T CARE," the dr says ...and that's pretty damn evident ....
he begins reading the reports again...
SUBJECT appears ENTRANCED!...as if "in another world" as if...AS IF Hearing things....subject is neither on the phone or wearing any visible ear buds.WHAT
DID
WE
AGREE UPON
about those ear buds?
"at midnight,at mid day.at morning" I say
"NOOOOOO that was about the SUNGLASSES....what did we say about the ear buds...he says
I tell him I forgot..
"always !" he says...never take them out of your ears...except.except..."
"except when nobody can see me"I say
and and and...he says....
"AND I should keep in mind that someone can always see me..even at home..Merge made sure your apartment was not a place YOU COULD HIDE IN..Merge pays for your food ,clothes,rent...some people most NORMAL people would enjoy the interface..the attention..one of our other subjects...one of my other patients...had the smart ida of carrying around a small bottle of vodka...guy doesn't drink but takes a teaspoon or two every coupla hours if he's out so if he's interfacing ....and anyone makes a "gaze" out of it...his breath is his alibi.smart guy...doesn't even need to wear sunglasses...smart guy//appreciates his "apps"...gets on with his mentors....guys think back in forth entire football games they've seen...think back and forth whole scenes from Diehard...their mentors don't call me and tell me someone is ruminating over the technology and going all Karen silkwood on the computer.....
"who's Karen Silkwood" I as.
"Look it up
seems you've been looking everything else ..up..
Karen silkwood,.some lesbian who got a job in some factory ..and was thief or something
and makes up some story bout ...the product the company makes.
..and can't shut her pie hole about it.
.like any woman...and next thing you hear is ...no more yapping..no more silkwood...
I have no control of what Merge or Neuronautics might do with someone who 'sticks out" he says..,,,,to some kinda sore thumb but maybe cut that sore thumb off..so it ain't so shine-ie no more...not so SORE looking......know what they do to lab rats or monkeys who bite or become problematic...they toss them in the incinerator
FRIDAY
less prattle prattle ....all they ask is I don't...THINK WRONG
there was something...
strangely soothing about the true schizophrenia ...encasement....after the fear seeps away you feel like a baby in a crib...
as the sounds of rhymes and nonsense...make you very much LIKE a baby.....un even to
even think....that morning I felt the nerves around my face ...tingle...the familiar BOP sh BOP of the cracking creak of my upper pallet..
the pain in my head.
and shoulda seen it coming
and do what
A BUS DRIVER ROUTE17
CON-CERN-ING erratic-A CISM
OF GUESS WHO?
My shrink says
He says PUPIL CORNEA CONFIGURATION cause FOR causation...*
*1968
The Mackworth Stand Camera for Measuring Line of sight vision
Data acquisition system for precision eye-fixation studies
M.BUCHSBAUM
A system has been developed to sense and record eye point-of-gaze for on-line computer processing, using a Mackworth camera in conjunction with a closed-circuit television system. System optics and electronics are described, together with computer software for system calibration and automatic artifact removal.
The difference between looking you in the eye and looking at the tip of your nose (a difference in point-of-gaze as small as 0.75 deg) can be detected by human in face-to-face contact . Studies of individual differences in perceptual and cognitive behavior(e.g.,Gardner & Long, 1962) and in the sequencing of eye fixations for pattern recognition (Noton & Stark, 1971) suggest the need for a system that enables the investigator to determine where a S is looking, how long he gazes,and where he looks next. Relatively accurate vertical and horizontal coordinates, as well as the length of time that they eye remains directed at a point, are needed in a form that conveniently allows statistical analysis.
In addition, precise control of stimulus delivery and convenient calibration procedures are necessary. The vertical and horizontal coordinates of point-of-gaze have generally been measured with motion picture recording techniques, the system becomes readily adaptable to a number of such machines without constructing special-purpose digital input interfaces. Eye position is indicated on the television monitor by a single bright spot produced by a virtual image of the light source
I tell the doc...it's THEM
it's merge
doing the over ride
showing me things. Pictures pictograms. You name it
or cybernetics
(they got it locked up
...the Neuronauts ..
'borrow" the technology
from the company THEY started .
...and since the tech is soooo.'sick"
they have an interest in keeping the "husk" they laid the Dots on quiet..
THING IS the idiot who agreed to have the "DOTS.the nano
..have no such interests
cept screeeeeeemin about it top at the of their lungs..
I don't say that to the doctor
I think it
...when I am busy or "engaged" with another...the mentors don't interface....they listen...
to not hear the Mentors...to at least feel they aren't reading me...is a pleasure.
I feel "cured" temporarily..
one doesn't realize what a luxury it was to have one's own mind as one's own that could not be
"fitted" towards
input output cybernetic "re -integration"
the doctor's main job
.
NOW
that I got the Dots in me
is more to manage "the dots"
more
than me
meaning his job is to
help me.
manage
the Merge
but it isn't working
there's no phones in his office......they're in a corner tied with cord...
he asks me to leave my cell phone outside the office...
so many mugs ,clocks ,pens and clocks with the Merge logo on them...what's the big secret than..
"Talkin to you mentors?" he says,"in that sick way I hear...."
"It's not called talking ..it's called Graphing. Or Merging ....minds don't speak to each other ..with Merge they think to one another.
I explain I don't think to them in a sick way..
I just think my own thoughts and they ...
comment on them..
the doctor says----"what they do is mirror your cognitions. back to you in "formats" so you and Merge might better understand ."Understanding"...everybody wins. They get to understand how Cybernetics works. And you get to be made aware of your thought style ...so you might change them..."
"that sounds good..doctor..but ..it's not quite like you say.."
"I UNDERSTAND THAT SOMEONE IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE SAYING ANYTHING AT ALL ...ABOUT THIS ...
(not quite legal not quite illegal ..somehow....)I GOTTA WARN YOU the doctor sighs MERGE AND NEURONAUTICS have a way of TAKEN' CARE OF Squealers
and Squeakers
ALL YOU ARE TO ME IS A STUDY,,,i made sure all of your documents say schizophrenic...but you gotta help me out here OK?
maybe he sees I get a sad look on my face...
Listen he says...trying to at least act like he likes me....;"I've gone out of my way to not present our sessions as Touchy Feelie
I have never displayed false regard upon you...I thought that you respected that..
I did I say(although I wonder) I do I say.
so..he says
so,I say back
"so quit fuckin things up...Sunglasses he says
"Even at night?" I say
he says -at night ,at mid day,at morning,till you get your wandering eye shit figured out.
you can't be gazing around seemingly staring at things nobody else sees
OR IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?
to get others to look at what you're looking at...
as if they'll see.
what you did ...
or you do you enjoy just looking like a wacko
I can't help but wonder I think a the same time I hear a beep
if the shrink talks to his other patients like this
I guess I was looking down when thinking this.i always seem to have my head down when the dr wells at me about how "i use" the dots..
I hear the dr,,,,clear his throat....and look up and see him wearing a bio sensor- ed headset..
"NO I don't treat my other patients like this.." he says taking off the headset..
"because my other patients have some common sense.."
the doctor sees me looking at the headset...the same headset he has shown me before....A Headset that reads my thoughts...
he says there are Merge employees who do nothing at all but read read read what I am thinking all all all day..
and I don't don't don't seem to change at all.
no matter how many
over rides they do to TRY TRY TRY to fix me.
fix me I say
they're not trying to fix me...
they're trying to kill me
"challenge you perhaps>"
he says
no ...no...I say. showing him my note book
...he glances at the book
and says.
and what made you think you had the right to write this down?The Dr Said..
....lemons .
you
lemons I
leeeemons leamurs chat tat racky shack back
lingo linear linlone
a pp le king
a p pl e c art...ma-gna mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmarta
{and during this.I hear thoughts that have not been made into "tacks"
I remember this stupid toy I had when I was young called 2XL
a n 8 track tape recorder ...really is all it was...cept you'd press the track buttons...to give answers to it's questions and the different tracks were cued "just so" that
you would GET answers..NOT from this Interface do I get answers ...but I get clues....
as to ....well....sometimes some "mentor " gets on ,,,"bareback" by gets on I mean he goes mind to mind...Pacific Rim I call it...I am forced to come up with words for
a language that has no equivalent....
mind to mind.is the way "I am Gathered" although.
often it's simply a program that mimics than fractal-izes the Mimic gathering more MOSS as my '"Readings" correspond to the new "set up"it's a way of getting rid of some of the problems of guesswork concerning their 70%/30? chance-load ....word...or use of that some random word...
has no tangential...to help with transcript
I hear sometimes .some.
times....words that come 'at me" more as thought>but I hear the way they hear their own thinking
"I grew up ,with these hippies"such a strange term...as these individuals were the opposite of hip.
unclean
ungroomed
rather like cavemen
but with none of the manly attributes that a cavemen needed to hunt .or fight.unmanly men.hippies.with flowers in their hair.
.. Siemens sofa igfarben nanocarbon.
linda N linda I LIDA linguistic programming
....pearly white teeth are the dapple of my rutheres kigh....pearly white teeth are the dapple of my rutheres kigh....pearly white teeth are the dapple of my rutheres kigh....pearly white teeth are the dapple of my rutheres kigh
faster and faster the words go....pearly white teeth are the dapple of my rutheres kigh....pearly white teeth are the dapple of my ruthers kigh
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
wehadfun wehad sen we hand mmmmeeeeeeezzonz in the sunnn n
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
others
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
got these pills mmm
and these...punishments?
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
the voice says...in varying pitches
c minor b flat f sharp g major.
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
... neuronautikkks want all people "like me" in an institution permanently
then used to just send big guys in leather jackets around....and put dirt in your gas tank and write notes to your employer that ......
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
would discredit
you
it was Raven DeClaridge ..and Gary Rainy that made this program.
so much cheaper than the goon squad.
I think of Gary Rainy near the pool...all pale..
and I get a pain on my head.
they can make out the imagine my mind....an unflattering one.
if I must think of GR I must think of the Picture of GR ...he wants displayed in the annexes ...
I think again of him wrong....at the pool...at the "ranch"
I can't help it..I am not goading the
machine..
or what I'm suppose to think of as ENTITIES after me for leaving "the group" and having SOME variance of NERVE
to write
NERVE the voice says fagggggit!you wanta se nervrve ...
linky lane luncheon lyrical lembeck leeeemurs
played ..
sang
and screamed
for the next hours
YOU GONNA BE GOOD!a second voice says....you gonna GET ON BOARD or you gonna be fagitman ingrate
I wonder why they closed down the mental institutions that housed "vague cases"
I am a vague case of ODD ...of weirdo...of sick...
chitty chat chum bum
nikrot num num
the voice begins doing the rhyme thing ..
and the tone ...
and even the nonsensabilities of the words. Well at least they rhyme ....and the rhyme that my group pulses...
are like gifts.
for one word sounding like another ...has a logic other wise missing ..
the sounds and it began meaning so little ...nothing
Obviously they felt in necessary to SHOW YOU what they could do IF They are forced to deal with a -the dr says...handing me back the notebook
all we're here to work on is .
you not making a spectacle of yourself with OUR
not YOUR equipment OK...what happens between you and your mentors...should stay between you and your mentors....not written down...not type out..how would you like if they gave your neural signals and recordings and the transcriptions of those signals to others?
the dr looks down at his own papers now .a gazer on route 17 reported that "the subject appeared, well.as a subject"...he looks at me....
"do you know how serious this is? do you care?"
"no " I think....and I am aware that I will pay for this later with perhaps another coupla hours of LINKYLALE LUDDITES or whatever...
"Yes" I say ,"I do care..."
"and why do you care?" he says
"I care because this technology can one day help people with locked in syndrome and dementia and people who...."
"YOU DON'T CARE," the dr says ...and that's pretty damn evident ....
he begins reading the reports again...
SUBJECT appears ENTRANCED!...as if "in another world" as if...AS IF Hearing things....subject is neither on the phone or wearing any visible ear buds.WHAT
DID
WE
AGREE UPON
about those ear buds?
"at midnight,at mid day.at morning" I say
"NOOOOOO that was about the SUNGLASSES....what did we say about the ear buds...he says
I tell him I forgot..
"always !" he says...never take them out of your ears...except.except..."
"except when nobody can see me"I say
and and and...he says....
"AND I should keep in mind that someone can always see me..even at home..Merge made sure your apartment was not a place YOU COULD HIDE IN..Merge pays for your food ,clothes,rent...some people most NORMAL people would enjoy the interface..the attention..one of our other subjects...one of my other patients...had the smart ida of carrying around a small bottle of vodka...guy doesn't drink but takes a teaspoon or two every coupla hours if he's out so if he's interfacing ....and anyone makes a "gaze" out of it...his breath is his alibi.smart guy...doesn't even need to wear sunglasses...smart guy//appreciates his "apps"...gets on with his mentors....guys think back in forth entire football games they've seen...think back and forth whole scenes from Diehard...their mentors don't call me and tell me someone is ruminating over the technology and going all Karen silkwood on the computer.....
"who's Karen Silkwood" I as.
"Look it up
seems you've been looking everything else ..up..
Karen silkwood,.some lesbian who got a job in some factory ..and was thief or something
and makes up some story bout ...the product the company makes.
..and can't shut her pie hole about it.
.like any woman...and next thing you hear is ...no more yapping..no more silkwood...
I have no control of what Merge or Neuronautics might do with someone who 'sticks out" he says..,,,,to some kinda sore thumb but maybe cut that sore thumb off..so it ain't so shine-ie no more...not so SORE looking......know what they do to lab rats or monkeys who bite or become problematic...they toss them in the incinerator
FRIDAY
less prattle prattle ....all they ask is I don't...THINK WRONG
there was something...
strangely soothing about the true schizophrenia ...encasement....after the fear seeps away you feel like a baby in a crib...
as the sounds of rhymes and nonsense...make you very much LIKE a baby.....un even to
even think....that morning I felt the nerves around my face ...tingle...the familiar BOP sh BOP of the cracking creak of my upper pallet..
the pain in my head.
and shoulda seen it coming
and do what
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